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Paula Deen, Things We Hate »

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THINGS WE HATE: Paula Deen’s Nuts
Posted on January 8th 2009 by FNH Staff

487_561_largeDuring a moment of weakness at my local grocery store, I picked up some of Paula Deen’s Handcooked Virginia Peanuts  with “House” seasoning. The side of the can proudly proclaims that these plump Virginia peanuts are from an old Southern recipe, and were hand-cooked and “sprinkled with Paula’s special blend of seasonings, y’all!”

Right above that, in all capital letters, said “FROM MY KITCHEN TO YOURS.” Really? Did Paula relocate? Because the product itself is made in Virginia, not in Georgia where Paula and her annoying sons Jamie and Bobby reside.

Upon opening the can of the “House blend” Peanuts, I realized that these were the largest peanuts I had ever laid my eyes on. They had an odd orange tint to them, sort of like Carson Daly, but chunkier looking. I decided to take the plunge and eat a few at once instead of the normal cautious nibble I give most things. What the hell, y’all! Throw caution to the wind – it’s Paula Deen!

Not so fast. Within seconds, my mouth began puckering up from the overwhelming amount of salt and seasoning on these things. I instinctively reached for some water, but it did nothing to rid my mouth of the vile taste the over-sized nuts left behind. I don’t know exactly whose “HOUSE” these seasonings were blended from, but  I can guarantee they had a roach problem.

While the taste was indeed bad, the texture and odor were worse. The nuts were hard, oily, and smelled like 3-day old Taco Bell.  Sorry, Paula your nuts have got to go.


Other posts on Food Network Humor:

---Just What The World Needs: More Paula Deen Nuts
---Paula Deen Really Love Nuts
---If Paula Deen Was President…
---New Teeth Options For Paula Deen
---Paula Deen’s Salt & Pepper Shaker

    11 Responses

  1. brett says:
    January 8, 2009 at 2:55 pm

    DISGUSTING! I had the Cajun variety and they tasted like I just licked a banjo player’s armpit. I love Paula Deen but her nuts as you say have to go.

    Reply
  2. Hamdi says:
    January 8, 2009 at 3:36 pm

    Paula should sell butter nuts. Id try those. These, not so much

    Reply
  3. Cuisineboy1975 says:
    January 8, 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Her Mopping Sauce isn’t too bad–I sampled it a number of times at the nearby Le Gourmet Chef.

    Reply
  4. jenna says:
    January 8, 2009 at 4:46 pm

    Has anyone tried Paula Deen’s salad dressing? They have it for sale at my local TJ Maxx (?!?!?!) and I want to try it, but it looks so thick and heavy.

    Reply
  5. Feikhal Madhur says:
    January 9, 2009 at 10:11 am

    TJ Maxx is the destination for unwanted, overpriced, , expired food products so be forewarned. Check the codes on some of the stuff. It is pretty scary.

    Anyone that needs to buy Paula Deen salad dressing and thinks they are getting something special is totally out of touch with reality. The woman is a sow.

    Reply
  6. Jenna says:
    January 18, 2009 at 12:25 pm

    When I re-ordered my favorite coffee (Torrefaizone Italia, Perugia blend) from cooking.com, I also ordered Paula Deen cheese straws. I absolutely love cheese straws, especially with a cold Coke but I digress. These cheese straws also contain her House seasoning. Paula should be ashamed, the cheese straws were abysmal. A Southern treat gone terribly awry. I ate one and threw both boxes (came as a pack of 2) away. Not fit for human consumption, tasted like a salt lick..with some extra nasty flavors tossed in.

    Reply
  7. Just What The World Needs: More Paula Deen Nuts « Food Network Humor says:
    June 17, 2009 at 12:01 am

    [...] crazy me, I thought Paula Deen ALREADY had her own nuts. In fact, we’re sure of it. We even reviewed them on Food Network Humor back in January. I’ll take “they were disgusting” for $500 [...]

    Reply
  8. bunny says:
    January 28, 2010 at 3:19 pm

    thanks for the heads up, y’all!! almost bought those nuts from tj maxx but now i’m glad i didn’t! i don’t think that i would buy anything endorsed by some food network “star” or any other celeb for that matter without checking out the product via taste tests or consumer advocates first! wasn’t it the paula deen cookware that was recalled a year ago because of high levels of some checmical or metal or something? made in china, right? hmmmm…..

    Reply
  9. Erika B. says:
    May 28, 2010 at 11:49 am

    I really dislike her.. She is so nasty.. First of all she has animals in her kitchen.. Where she prepares food.. Does she not know that is nasty? You should not have any animals in the kitchen.. You do not know, what they have? Secondly she licks her fingers, while she prepares food.. Who does this.. That is so nasty… She does this and give food to her guest.. Lastly.. Why does she have to taste everything, before it is done? Her son’s do the same thing.. She needs to be off t.v. She is just nasty..

    Reply
  10. usgonemad says:
    June 23, 2010 at 7:40 am

    I watched Paula when she first arrived on television and within a very few short months……….I turned her off. I am annoyed by her southern accent, and don’t tell me that I’m being cruel because that’s how they talk in the south. HOGWASH! She is adding on as much of that southern drawl as she possibly can, emphasizing every single “YaHaLLL’. I have family in the south and they don’t talk anything like Paula. This is a tool that she has probably been asked to emphasize in order to create attention. About her products..DON’T BUY THEM, ANY OF THEM! Her cooking pans are made somewhere, I believe Thailand. They fall apart. I ordered her unique measuring spoons. Each spoon as the measurement on it, but one of the measurements you can’t even read. In fact, on one of her segments, SHE couldn’t read it either…handed it to her son Jamie…and he couldn’t read it. Had nothing to do with it being small, it was plenty big enough but you couldn’t decipher the numbers. I laughed because that told me that she puts out products and someone else does all the handling of the products. She should have never put her name on any products that she sells unless she personally checks out the quality and it’s obvious she doesn’t. The woman’s cooking is a heart attack waiting to happen. Saw an episode that included Bobbie’s “girlfriend”…I got so sick of hearing “sweetie, honey, buttercup” and the dingbat girlfriend had a voice like she sucked on a balloon filled with helium. It’s not a cooking show at all, it’s all about yacking, having stupid guests help you cook and the guest is wearing roller skates….stupid stupid stupid. The show has run it’s course, the “newness” has worn thin. It’s time to go Paula!

    Reply
  11. Shannon says:
    September 16, 2010 at 3:40 pm

    I guess I came across the wrong page because I LOVE these nuts! I am actually eating some right now. I realize this “review” was done well over a year ago so the formula might have changed, but I really like them. They are nothing at all like what you have described.

    Reply

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