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Ridiculous Alex Guarneschelli Quote Of The Week
Published on: March 30, 2009 – 10:10 am by Jillian Madison 
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While we were on vacation, FNH reader John D. wrote in with a hysterical, spot-on assessment of judge Alex Guarneschelli’s appearances as a judge on Chopped:
“…she seems to have some arbitrary perspective on what a chef is; centered on the idea that she must always appear condescending and hypercritical even when there is nothing to criticize. So many times I’ve watched her make that stupid Guarneschelli squinty-eyed open-mouthed glance to the left as she conjures up an incredibly stupid sounding commentary…” -John D.
Exhibit A: When tasting a contestant’s prune dessert soup on Chopped, Alex Guarneschelli remarked, “I do find the prunes large. I do think if I were just given a spoon and no instruction I would be wrestling with these prunes a bit.”
Now she needs instructions on how to eat a prune? Come on, Alex. Get yourself a copy of “PRUNES FOR DUMMIES” and call it a day.
(Thanks for the tip, John!)
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---The Alex Guarnaschelli Zombie Photo---Alex Guarnaschelli’s Fish en Papillote en 8 MILES OF TIN FOIL
---A Heartwarming Selection Of Alex Guaranschelli’s Most Fattening Tweets
---Alex Guarnaschelli: The Next Fat Chef?
---Alex Guarnaschelli’s Constant Nose Crinkling Irks Me
THIS WEEK: Ina Garten's "beginner" recipes, new Food Network shows starting in September, thumbing through an issue of Semi-Homemade magazine, Rachael Ray's daytime talk show, Aarti's "accountability group", Claire Robinson on Big Daddy's House, another sensual reading of Alex Guarnaschelli's tweets, sink or swim voicemail, and much more.
Thank you very much John D for pointing this out. I think this chick just loves the sound of her own voice sometimes and will say anything just for the sake of sounding authoritative.
She isn’t the only “judge” on Food Network that acts like a fool sometimes.
Look at any Food Network Challenge. The judges on that show sound clueless most of the time.
I think they make a point of wearing chef jackets to reinforce to everyone they are actual “chefs” because much of their commentary is just gibberish and like Guarneschelli’s, void of substance or reason.
I like this feature! About time someone started calling Alexandra out. The woman is so high on herself that it’s disgusting. She almost makes Chopped unwatchable for me.
The woman is a food snob x 100. Well said John D.
Oh, you guys are being so harsh! You’ve gotta admit prunes can be so terribly baffling. I’ve read Prunes for Dummies several times and I still don’t get it right every time ….
*snark snark*
Thank goodness I’m not the only one who has a problem with this chick. She is an executive chef, as are many of the contestants on “Chopped”, yet I get the impression after seeing her as a judge on numerous occasions that she thinks she is somehow superior to her peers on the other side. And only because she hosts a show on FN, one that I don’t even watch.
I am an unabashed retard. I scored a “4″ on my S.A.T., I live in my mother’s basement, I have had a lobotomy, and I am completely satisfied occupying myself with only dirty crayons and mud to play with.
Thank you Food Network for creating a celebrity that even I can feel superior to. I eat my own poop.
Get ready for more Alex Guarnaschelli is truly her. They sure use enough make up on her face. The new show is a far cry from the Cooking Loft and Chopped. Those two shows were real stupid, but if we all copy her receipes and cook like Alex we’ll all end up in the ER room.
Alex Guarnaschelli is lame! Her ‘dirty look’ she give everyone is more than I can tolerate. I’d like to see HER compete in Chopped… wonder if she’d go out on the 1st or 2nd round? There is a contestant on another Food Network show that has that same ugly glare, she’s blond. Can’t remember what show, but UGH! is it a relative???
A ridiculously shallow “root comment” from John D. Of the range of chefs appearing on the Food Netork – particularly as judges, Alex G. is by far the most sublime. In other words, she has the greatest ability to translate the experience of the food – taste, aroma, texture, etc. into words. It’s a lot like reviews on art, architecture, interior design, music – they are sensory experiences difficult to verbalize. She excels. Your observations on “… squinty-eyed open-mouthed glance …” is a matter of Food Network editing. Maybe Brain Boitano is just for you.