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New Food Network Shows
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The Food Network sent out a press release thisafternoon, revealing a bunch of new series that will be premiering over the next few months. Though some of these seem like Food Network Humor parodies (WHAT WOULD BRIAN BOITANO MAKE? REALLY?!?!), we promise these are all legit. Ready? Let’s do this.
1. CHEFS VS CITY, premieres July 2009
Description: Acclaimed chefs Chris Cosentino and Aaron Sanchez are pitted against two local foodies in a winner-takes-all race through a different city each week, through the most fascinating, unusual food locations. Each team begins with a clue leading them to their first food challenge. Challenges could include everything from wine stomping to the eating the spiciest chili west of the Mississippi to diving for sea urchins! The five challenges take the chefs and foodies on an adrenaline-charged, food-lovers tour of each city, and once complete, it’s a sprint to the finish line to see if the locals can protect their home turf or if the Food Network chefs can conquer a new city.
SNAP JUDGMENT: Sounds exactly like the Amazing Race, but with food. I bet that’s exactly how the creator pitched it, too.
2. WORST COOKS IN AMERICA, premieres January 2010
Description: Premiere chefs Anne Burrell and Beau MacMillan each take on a team of six hopeless home cooks and try to transform them from kitchen zeros into kitchen heroes in only 10 days. Viewers will follow 12 “recruits” as they face a series of high-pressure culinary challenges to help triumph over their inability to cook. The two who make it to the end will face the final challenge: prepare a three-course, restaurant-quality meal for a panel of food critics who think they are tasting dishes prepared by chefs Anne and Beau. On the line are the chefs’ professional reputations, $25,000 for the recruits, and the chance to say they are no longer one of the Worst Cooks in America!
SNAP JUDGMENT: Hopefully Sandra Lee will be one of the “recruits.”
3. FOODS THAT CHANGED THE WORLD, premieres 3Q 2010
Description: Food guru Alton Brown hosts this mini series that explores foods that have shaped the course of human history and influenced the way our species evolved. Alton will also investigate foods of the future and how technology will transform food worldwide in centuries to come.
SNAP JUDGMENT: Y-A-W-N. Sounds like something your crotchety college professor would make you watch during sophomore year sociology. Hopefully this won’t be Alton’s only new gig over the next few years.
4. SANDRA’S MONEY SAVING MEALS, premieres May 10, 2009
Description: Well-known for her trademark Semi-Homemade cooking style, Sandra Lee now has her sights set on saving money! Her new daytime cooking series, Sandra’s Money Saving Meals, features incredible budget-friendly recipes for every day of the week. To maximize 
cost-saving success, Sandra shares unique ideas for savvy supermarket shopping, proper pantry stocking, and menu price points. She continues to stretch the dollar by creating a clever leftover dish from each episode with “Round 2 Recipes” exclusively on FoodNetwork.com. Sandra makes saving money simple, achievable and delicious for everyone!
SNAP JUDGMENT: It’s going to be just like Semi-Homemade, but it’s going to suck even harder. (Oh come on, Sandra Lee fans. Even you know it’s true.)
5. WHAT WOULD BRIAN BOITANO MAKE? premieres August, 2009
Description:Everyone knows Brian Boitano won an Olympic gold medal in figure skating. What they don’t know: Brian is an accomplished cook who loves to entertain! In this new series, Brian takes viewers on a reality cooking adventure as he creates amazing food for a new event in each episode. Funny, knowledgeable and irresistible, Brian brings himself and so much more to What Would Brian Boitano Make?
SNAP JUDGMENT: This…. sounds like a horrible joke. Are we being punked? How long until the rubber bracelet comes out? WWBBM?
6. TAKE ON THE TAKEOUT, premieres 2010
Description: In Take on the Takeout, Danny Boome visits delivery devotees with one goal in mind: to prepare a healthier, tastier, and less-expensive version of their favorite take-out dish faster than the restaurant can cook and deliver it. In addition to assessing cost and speed, the loyal customers taste and score the dueling dishes while blindfolded to determine the ultimate winner. With his practical ideas and British charm, Danny attempts to send the delivery boy packing to prove home-cooked meals beat take out any day!
SNAP JUDGMENT: Sounds like a boring mix of Rescue Chef or Take Home Chef with Curtis Stone, meets Throwdown with Bobby Flay. Jeez, is it so hard to air decent programming? I could come up with 12 more original series, per hour, off the top of my head! A bet a lot of FNH readers could, too!
Hang in there guys, ’cause if this is the best of what we have to look forward to on the Food Network for the next year and a half, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---Food Network Takes On South Park---New Cooking Channel/Food Network Shows
---5 Food Network Game Shows That Should Exist
---Melissa D’Arabian Loves Brian Boitano’s Pork
---FNH Review: What Would Brian Boitano Make
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28 Responses
The Brian Boitano series has a lot of us a bit confused, as well… but hey…I guess I’ve never been one to turn down sequins.
Just what we need.Another challenge show where some hapless FN jamoke gets to mutter “someone is going home tonight”.
Well thought out FN.
As for what Brian Boitano would make, probably something with vegetables, since we all know Brian loves his vegetables, especially zucchini.
LOL… that was funny Rachael.
Sigh…..makes me miss Julia Child and Graham Kerr more than ever. 8(
Oh dear. Those shows sound absolutely…….. AWFUL!
Ugh!
None of the new shows are anything I will be watching. They all sound kind of (as my son says) MEH!!!I agree with Byrdie, it makes me miss the “old” FN stars.
I’m looking forward to Money Sucking Meals purely for the snark factor.
Wow, I’ve never seen an entire channel jump the shark before…
Automne,
I think you are quite right about the jumping of the shark. It isn’t just one show, it’s pretty much all of them.
After alienating loyal viwers with stupid programs and insulting our intelligence by making Aaron McCArgo a winner on NFNS, they are now working on obtaining new viewers with lame-o reality format dogshit shows. I suppose it will only be a matter of time before they get fed up as well.
Is it Tuschman who is left to make these decisions ? He should resign . Or throw himself out of his office window.
I think a few of these shows will get good viewership, Chefs vs. City in particular. I call it the “DDD Effect” (diners, drive-ins and dives) – each time a new episode airs, the featured restaurants double and triple their business the following day. People will travel Out Of Their Way to eat where Guy ate.
Anytime FN travels out into the country to visit local places is a good thing for local places. Hey, it’s a nationally broadcast commercial. People are proud of their home communities and will tune in to cheer on their neighborhoods and residents.
And you know WWBBM will bring in new viewers. Any figure skating fan will suddenly be searching their cable listings for what channel FN is on – never having watched a cooking show before. Ever. I’m just wondering if Scott Hamilton, Sasha Cohen and Michelle Kwan will be guest stars ….
There are a few problems with your theory Lana:
1) The “DDD EFFECT” does not last more than a few days. People get tired of things. People forget. And the American public has a short attention span. It’s a good thing for restaurants, sure, but it does not have a lasting effect… so ultimately, it has no effect at all.
2) Brian Boitano was old news when they made fun of him on South Park, and he’s even older news now. He’s even more of a has-been than the people being heckled on Dancing With The Stars. I don’t think many figure skating fans will tune in to watch him at all… exactly the same way that HARDLY ANY figure skating fans tuned in to watch Scott Hamilton (arguably the most popular and well known male figure skater ever) on Celebrity Apprentice.
Neo, with all due respect (and I mean that – totally respect your well-written argument) I should assert that the DDD Effect lasts for much longer than a few days. Reruns, my friend, make the difference. Moreover, note that the DDD (ahem) “cookbook” is a NY Times bestseller.
Some spots in my area were featured months ago, and they’re still hoppin’ crazy. A local bbq joint is having difficulties keeping up with demand, running out of brisket at 5pm, having to turn people away at the door and searching desperately for apple wood for his smoker. All due (by interviews I’ve done with the owners) to DDD.
Anyway – I’m not saying these shows will have *that* kind of effect. My point is that shows that highlight local joints will draw local viewers. If Chefs vs. City is done in large metropolitan areas, as I expect it will be, viewership will be good. Again, totally in my humble opinion.
Your WWBBM argument is well taken. I am no skating fan and am only conjecturing. Nonetheless, I’ll tune in purely out of curiosity, at least for one episode. :-)
Hey, maybe FN should make a “What Would Ron Jeremy Make” show! Isn’t he the king of reality shows these days? *giggling*
p.s. I should add that I interviewed Fieri about the DDD Effect too. He confirmed that the majority of the restaurant owners have given him and the DDD production company similar feedback on the overwhelming increase in business after a show airs. It’s quite a phenomenon.
p.p.s. I’m interviewing Scott Hamilton in a couple weeks. I’ll ask him about that Celebrity Appearance thingy! Thx for the tip! *smiles* Got any more? heehee
I’ve been to several of the dives featured on DDD as well. And of course, many of these dives were ALREADY popular with the locals, who were annoyed by the brief spikes in traffic from DDD and the random reruns, but I doubt any have experienced permanent changes in traffic. Maybe longer than a few days, but not by much.
(I’m not impressed Guy Fieri confirmed this DDD effect. That means nothing to me. Of course Guy Fieri is going to try to sell you on how wonderful he is and how powerful he is because he has a small band of sad and lonely followers.)
I do have one more tip for you. Why don’t you stop interviewing boring people like Guy Fieri and Scott Hamilton and start interviewing funny people like Jillian Madison who deserves all the press she can get for this killer blog? Hmm?
Forgive me, but “FOODS THAT CHANGED THE WORLD” sounds really interesting but then I am a PBS junkie.
Dear Sweet Jesus.
Every time I think that the Food Network can’t get any worse, they do…this.
Remember when they used to have REAL cooking shows? Hell, at this point I would take the old “all Emeril all the time” programming that they used to have.
Also, why don’t they put Gordon Ramsay’s F-word on in reruns? At least he’s mildly entertaining and actually has cooking on his shows.
I second Clare’s opinion. I love the history of food. For instance, historically, the country that rules the spice trade rules the world. Currently that country is the U.S.A.
As for the rest? That’s what you get when you have former execs from Nickelodeon making important decisions for FN.
Is it former Nickelodean execs making decisions at FN ? I would think for sure they would have some MTV/VHI castoffs trying to attract the reprobate viewer. That’s why they have many of these “no talent” schmeckels like Adam Gertler and Noah Starr on shows.
And Lana, I too think you should interview Jillian because reading this site everyday is FAR MORE ENTERTAINING than watching the crash and burn on Food Network and she would probably provide an entertaining interview.
I must run now. I have an interview planned with Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi. Then Scott Hamilton.hehehe
*chuckling* Sorry my interviewees have been lame – I kinda go where my paper sends me, and the only FN stars who’ve come into my area so far are Fietti and the Neelys, omg.
But rather than interview Jillian, I’d rather we collaborate on a pilot for a new FN show … ROAST THE FN HOSTS. A Chef’s Roast. Paula’d go for it in a heartbeat. The Flay Bobby Flay episode would have ratings through the roof and the Sear Alton Brown episode would be stellar. We’d totally make bank! Teehee.
Jillian, babe. Have your people call my people. We’ll do lunch. Make it sushi. Gotta go. Cell phone’s ringin’. By the way, which one’s Pink ….
…exactly which paper do you write for? Or are you not at liberty to say?
I’d rather see an interview with Jillian too! But with like a main newspaper or blog. Hmm, going to make a phonecall. I love this site and want to see it really do well!
Erin
I’m up there with the people looking forward to “FOODS THAT CHANGED THE WORLD.” Normally I’d cruise right past that one, but as long as it’s AB doin’ the talking, I’ll tune in!
Personally, I’d rather watch reruns of Debbi Fields’Dessert Show , Door Knock Dinners, the original How to Boil Water and the Two Fat Ladies. Those corny shows got us hooked on FoodTV. Today,all those cake challenges are making me queasy.
I’ll pass on the inedible plastic fondant.
Lana, are you just ignoring me or do you not want to share which newspaper you write for? Still say you should interview FNH, instead of collaborating on a show that will never come to fruition.
The thought of Aaron Sanchez as a host of anything automatically makes that show seem like a must non-watch. After he got eliminated on Next Iron Chef, I figured that’d be that. Then he showedup as a recurring judge on Chopped as the “Leading authority on Latin cuisine”(?). His lack of anything anyone in front of the camera needs, along with his seeming unwillingness to critique anything past the point of “Well I didn’t LOVE it, but it had it’s good moments, etc” make this show seem super blah.
And as for the Foods That Shaped the World show, I don’t care. I will watch anything AB is in, and I’ll be interested.
Whoever said the DDD Effect was minimal at best, with no lasting effects, is 100% correct. Apparently, before DDD films, the FOOD NETWORK PEOPLE THEMSELVES tell restaurant owners to expect a “30 percent boost in traffic for two weeks following the episode airing” – and then, after that, only 5%-8% of people stick around or come back.
Sorry, Guy, you’re not as influential as you think. Ego check: delivered.
Source: http://blogs.browardpalmbeach.com/cleanplatecharlie/2009/05/flakowitz_of_boynton_guy_fieri_food_network.php
Paddington was a gastronomic wasteland untill Roosters hit the scene
with 20/20 hindsight, i love brian boitano’s show and find it hysterical and him a pleasure to watch. Agree with previous posters – if alton’s doing it, i’ll give it a try. I too miss Door KNock Dinners and Two Fat Ladies.