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This Woman Really Hated Her Paula Deen Pie
Published on: September 24, 2009 – 11:01 am by Jillian Madison 
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We get a lot of interesting mail here on FNH. We usually post a collection of them every few weeks to give you a little glimpse into our world, but this correspondence was so special… so endearing… that we felt it deserved its own post.
Back story: A few weeks ago, Paula Deen was busy getting ready to launch her own line of baked goods at Wal-Mart. Apparently, the Deen train moves fast, because not only have the new products hit stores, but people have already become horrified by their awfulness.
That brings us to this email. A woman named Jules bought one of Paula’s signature pies and was so disgusted by it, she ran to her computer and wrote this charming, well crafted e-mail to the first person she could find. Apparently, that was me:
i had bought a crunchy apple pie from walmarton saturdaysept 19 th. for $ 7.50 it was the worse tasting,mushy bottom,not a crunch to it pie, i have ever eaten.i have been a chef for over 30 years now retired.i never thought of myself being a baker. butttt come on your name is on the product. sorry.
Though I’d never heard of a store called “walmarton”, and usually don’t reply to these e-mails, this time I couldn’t resist:
Hi Jules,
Was this a Paula Deen crunchy apple pie you’re talking about? What was wrong with it?
Two minutes later, I received this more in-depth reply. Apparently I angered her, because she started writing IN ALL CAPS:
yes it was a PAULA DEEN CRUNCHY APPLE PIE. IT WAS UNDER COOKED BOTTOM AND ALTHROUGH THE PIE WAS DOUGHY. I THOUGHT IT WAS A PAR BAKED PIE, I LOOKED ON PLASTIC TOP TO MAKE SURE IT WASN’T A PAR BAKED THATS HOW RAW THE DOUGH WAS.I THROUGH IT OUT AND SPIT OUT THE BITE I TOOK FROM IT.
Wow. It must have been really gross for her to have to “through” the whole thing out. The poor thing. Still, I felt I needed more info, so I wrote Jules one more e-mail to clear a few things up:
Hello Jules. I am not sure what a PAR BAKED PIE is. Can you explain it? What state did you purchase this pie in? What made you purchase this Paula Deen pie? Are you a big fan?
On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being the worst and 10 being the best, exactly how disgusting was the pie?
You mentioned you’ve been a chef for 30 years. What’s your favorite thing to cook?
Jules replied yet again, and this time, was kind enough to explain the workings of a par baked pie:
a par baked is something that is a little bit baked,then u bake it when u need it.i just saw the pie it looked good . bought it in XXXXX,florida.1being the worse it was a minus 2. i cooked around the world ,being of italian decent i prefer italian cooking.
You hear that, Giada? It might be time to consider your own line of pies.
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---UPDATE: Paula Deen’s Wal-Mart Apple Pie---Woman’s World Invites Us To “Party Like Paula Deen”
---Get Ready, Y’all: Paula Deen Baked Goods Coming To A Wal-Mart Near You
---Paula Deen On The View
---Why, Paula Deen, Why!
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- Oct 28, 2009: UPDATE: Paula Deen’s Wal-Mart Apple Pie « Food Network Humor
THIS WEEK: Ina Garten's "beginner" recipes, new Food Network shows starting in September, thumbing through an issue of Semi-Homemade magazine, Rachael Ray's daytime talk show, Aarti's "accountability group", Claire Robinson on Big Daddy's House, another sensual reading of Alex Guarnaschelli's tweets, sink or swim voicemail, and much more.
These emails are so funny!!! How do you not just crack up reading them all day.
Gosh, who would have thought that a pie cooked somewhere offsite, covered in plastic, put on a truck, stuck on a loading dock, then stocked on a shelf wouldn’t be good?
So true JMSIV!!!LOL!
I know why it was soggy– it was the 15 sticks of butter in it.
How anyone – ANYONE – could confuse this with Paula Deen’s website is beyond me. I know there are a lot of stupid people in the world, but come on now.
What was she hoping for anyway? A free pie? Her money back? Please! She’d have to rip it from Paula’s cold, dead hands!
The real story here is that people are paying $7.50 for a pie at Wal-mart. Girl, please. I wouldn’t pay a penny over $5. GO TO A BAKERY for that price!!!
@Erin. Yeah, but the great thing about Wal-Mart is that Jules can take her half-eaten pie back, plop it on the Customer Service Desk, tell the clerk it’s crappy, and get a full refund! You can’t do that at a local bakery.
I totally agree, Squarebob!! I just don’t get how people spend their cash on something that sucks, and then just toss it in the trash. That’s just nuts. Take it back to the store and get your money back. This lady, of course, isn’t quite, uhhh, ‘normal’, so I would give her a pass on thinking logically. Could be her spaceship doesn’t go into reverse..
“I know why it was soggy– it was the 15 sticks of butter in it.”
I was thinkin’ bacon grease or lard ;)
If enough people started returning the pies to Wal-Mart, the good folks at Wally World will get the hint and stop stocking them. That’s the only way to stop Pauler’s latest adventure in captialism.
@Squarebob: In this part of the country, which is infamous for the 2000 Presidental Election disaster, people will eat every bite of food they intend to return, take the empty package back and receive a full refund. Walmart is not the only retailer to permit such egregious behavior.
@CherryRose: There probably was bacon grease or lard in it. Otherwise, it wouldn’t be a Paula Deen creation. That, and the package must have the phrase “YA’LL!” slapped somewhere on it.
@Alex
Chinese Lard no doubt. You think Paula and Wally world will pay for good ole American lard?!
@DesignerJeans: Absolutely not. I was going to say her pies were laced with Chinese lead-tainted drywall, or something along those lines. I’m glad you mentioned that. Wally World would never sacrifice its bottom line for quality.
This is funny – but scares me to death at the same time at how uneducated most of society seems to be. Is texting partly to blame, that people think it is OK to type “u” instead of “you”? But anyway before I go off on a rant.. to hear that Paula Deen pie is horrible, no surprise.
A co-worker of mine recently visited Paula’s restaurant in Savannah and reported the awfulness of it to me. No wonder the locals avoid it like the plague.
As long as the pies don’t include any left over metal shavings from Guy Ferry’s Hot Rod Knife Sets, I guess people should count their blessings!
NO, don’t give Tits McGee the idea…now the freezer aisle will be contaminated with MASSS-CARRR-POUW-NEEEH pies!
Perhaps it won’t be long before we hear about a recall of Poopy Pauler’s Pies just like her cheap Chinese cookware.
Whew! I was holding my breath, hoping that Jules wasn’t from Mississippi.
Just for kicks, I looked up Pauler’s recipe for this pie, and I have to say it’s nothing special. I could certainly see how the crust could be soggy with 12 tablespoons of BUTTER in it (besides the 1/4 cup of shortening), and with a whole 16 oz jar of applesauce in the filling! YUCK!
Applesauce? Applesauce??? What, is Pauler hanging with Mommy Dearest now? OMG. Is there bacon in the pie too??
@KittyKitty, how many preservatives to keep 12 T of butter from going rancid I wonder?
Well, if the pie flops, they can always market it as a laxative…
@Brydie, you read my mind. They shop together, on Wednesdays, before 9 am, and use coupons to get the best price!
@oh_come_on
LOL! Super Discounted Milk Mommies Unite!
Oh Come On, do you suppose they buy the applesauce even if it’s not on sale? The horror!
@Byrdie, if it’s not on sale they buy store brand, oh the horror!
Byrdie, Melissa M’mommy probably uses her left over baby applesauce, so it’s FREE!
I’m strangely tempted to buy one and see how much it sucks.
Oh Come On, how can they possibly live?
I just checked out the Wally World’s website and they show four Poopy baked goods: the apple pie (and we all know how good that is), a butter cake (gee, wonder what the main ingredient in that sucker is?), a pecan pie (more butter and even more sugar) and a fudge pie (guess Pauler is staying with the poo theme).
Jules is a retired chef of thirty years. I’m curious how ones ability to spell affects russipies. Maybe she needs a “decent” Italian like Giada to translate.
That is just hilarious. I looked up “par baked” and it is short for partially baked.
Are the Paula Deen baked goods with other fresh bakery items, or are they frozen? I’ve never been to Walmart – there isn’t one anywhere close to me – but I doubt that I’d shop there anyway.
Par baking is not unusual. You just wouldn’t have a ‘fresh’ pie in the bakery department sitting on a shelf that is par baked. It would have to be frozen because it’s not cooked all the way through. If she was a chef, common sense should have told her it couldn’t have been par baked, so I don’t get why she is confused.
I agree, par baking is not bad. Just label as such.
I want to know if her pies contain any partially hydrogenated oils in them….
If so, she needs to shut up up health and diet in general because she obviously does not care about it for her products.
“You just wouldn’t have a ‘fresh’ pie in the bakery department…”
So, the PD baked goods are in the bakery department at Walmart, not frozen, and probably have a limited shelf life. I wonder if they’re marked “clearance” after a few days – you know, to go with the “clearance” milk that Mommie Dearest buys.
The other day I watched Paula cooking with her son (I admit I’m a masochist) Jaime, and they made some god awfull 10,000 calorie dessert. As Jaime was pouring hot coffee over the goo…he said..”now you pour the hot coffee over the ice-cream”…Paula quickly interjected…”It’s Michael’s coffee”…The Captain’s Choice…
I googled it…and sure enough Mr. Paula Deen’s picture came up with the Santy beard and captain’s hat. I get the feeling ol Paula’s getting while the getting’s good. Her act and her accent is getting pretty tired, so she may as well sell while she’s “hot”. Paula & Co. are going to need that money when all those heart valves pop and the arteries finally close for the holidays. Health care is expensive Y’All!
Aaron McCargoo, is that you texting FNH pretending to be a woman (again)????
Here is the link at Walmart.com to view pictures and descriptions of Paula Deen’s Baked Goods: http://tinyurl.com/y943lxq
The images of Paula’s pies and cakes on the Walmart site are really horrific looking. All four items look dried out, cracked, over cooked and really nasty.
12 tbp butter + 1/4 cup shortening + 1 jar of applesauce = diarrheic fun for the whole family!
OMG! Pauler has taken this to The Limit! I was Laughing My Ass off at the Email Exchange
Did I miss the discussion about how many items Pauler’s selling at Walmart? 96 came up when I searched-cookbooks, cookware sets (in every ugly color imaginable), separate pots/pans, dinnerware sets, teakettles, griddles, scale, knife blocks and steak knives, bakers, cutting boards, bakeware, mixing bowls, prep bowls, spatulas, perculators, wooden spoons, casseroles, dressing mixer and egg beater.
A lot of it looks like it fell off a wild west wagon train. Since when is that ’southern’?
My personal favorite is a ‘Cast iron HOE CAKE pan, in red for $49.95. Get real Pauler, you’re the merchandise HOE!
I made an interesting discovery today. I was going through several years of back issues of Cook’s Illustrated. I happened to have one in which Christopher Kimball paid tribute to Julia Child. In his article, he pointed out that Julia NEVER lent her name to ANYTHING. Can you imagine? A “celebrity chef” without a line of sub-par cookware or awful processed food products.
It’s too bad that all these “chefs” today claim that Julia is their idol. Maybe they should show their admiration for her by EMULATING her!
**soapbox rant over**
FoodieOne,
Good point. Even Julia Child would be offended by the amount of butter PAAAWLA DEEEEN is using. Wasn’t butter supposed to be used to enhance the flavor of food not drown it and increase the number of patients in cardiac arrest?
By the way, at Target on my way home from work, they are carrying PAAAWLA DEEEN’s cookware as well. Thanks, but I’ll stick with Kitchenaid.
Paula Deen’s Hair Pie. I want my money back.
Stop hatin’ on Wal-Mart, y’all. I saw Pauler’s (and Rachael’s) “cookware” at Macy’s the other day – and laughed.
How can someone be old enough to have been a chef for 30 years and yet be so absolutely stupid? Also, any person over the age of 11 who writes their e-mails using “u” should be shot. Effing idiots, please, shut them off on an island all their own so they can breed with other idiots but not mingle with or bother the rest of us.
Oh! Please respond back to her correcting her previous e-mails and pointing out how a well-written e-mail could have made her point in a more effective manner. Let her know people do not like complaints to start with and will rarely try to interpret such utter dumbness to wade through to the heart of a complaint. Also, let her know it helps if you send your complaints TO THE RIGHT FREAKIN’ PLACE!
Byrdie, I can guarantee you that “common sense” and this woman have never met, not even on a cold, dark night in HELL.
@JustANobody: Effing idiots, please, shut them off on an island all their own so they can breed with other idiots but not mingle with or bother the rest of us.
LOL, why don’t you tell us how you REALLY feel?
JustANobody, I’m with you. It’s a real head-scratcher how this woman made it 30 years in the chef business. Of course, the word ‘chef’ has taken on an entirely new meaning since FN came on scene. Anybody who picks up a knife or spatula is now labeled ‘chef’. It’s laughable and pitiful at the same time. Hey, wait, I guess that makes me a chef! Wow Wee!! I have several knives and a gaggle of spatulas and tons of wooden spoons! I must be a Master Chef!
@Ferd: Stop hatin’ on Wal-Mart, y’all.
Pauler’s the focus friend Ferd, not Walmart.
LOL- OH Come On- I was holding back :)
And Byrdie, I think that makes you “Master Chef Extraordinaire” ha! :D
I thought the term was blind baked, not par baked, but I guess you learn something every day.
How do people manage to fire off these emails to people and don’t even know where they are sending them? Unreal.
“I thought the term was blind baked, not par baked, but I guess you learn something every day.”
I’ve always thought that “blind baking” referred to pre-baking a pie crust, torte shell, etc. without the filling that is added later.
Par-baked means that the bread, pie, etc. is partially-baked and will need more oven time before it can be eaten. This is similar to par-boiling potatoes for a recipe that includes other ingredients added to the potatoes and then baked before serving, i.e. scalloped and/or au gratin potato dishes.
A little humor, oh_come_on. Thus the “y’all.”
Paula Deen admitted in a magazine interview once that she does not eat the food she cooks. That pretty much tells you everything.
“Paula Deen admitted in a magazine interview once that she does not eat the food she cooks. That pretty much tells you everything.”
I’ll buy that – she probably eats worse! LOL!
That said, I saw PD make Steak Diane last week and will prepare her version for DH and I tonight. I haven’t made this in years and hesitate to order it in a restaurant because of the cream (I have that lactose thing going on in recent years). Paula’s recipe has no cream, and I will double up on the mushrooms and add a splash of Cognac.
JustANobody, thank you! Can you imagine if I had a commerical grade stove!? OMG. I would be able to rule the world!! (throw head back and insert diabolical laugh here)
Because I am an avid fan of FNH, I, byrdie, went on a fact finding mission of great magnitude. I fought the traffic. I braved the parking lot. I entered the local Wally World and YES: I did it on a Friday afternoon. I know, I know. I risked life and limb fighting the crowds. But I did it all for my pals at FNH. And I can report that I not only survived but I came back with some investigation resulted in some very interesting information.
I found the Poopy’s pastry products! My first encounter was on the “manager’s clearance” rack. It was there I spotted “Paula Deens Gooey Butter Cake”. Yes, on clearance. Marked down from $3 to $1.80. I saw three of these cakes on clearance, and then spotted a “Paula Deen Fudge Pie”, marked down from $7.50 to $4.50. As I picked up the “Gooey Butter Cake” (serves two), I began to read the label. It was then that I almost ran screaming from the building. “Gooey” had 18 grams of fat (28%); saturated fat 55% and TRANS FAT OF 1%! Yes, trans fat, my friends. Not to mention 40 grams of sugar. And this was per serving. Oddly enough “Gooey BUTTER Cake” had butter as an ingredient about 20 from the first ingredient, meaning the sat fat came from wonderful stuff like Palm Oil.
The “Fudge Pie”? 38% fat, 70% sat fat and .5% trans fat with 39 grams of sugar.
I eventually recovered from my horrors and went to the bakery department. There I found the other items, the apple and pecan pies. Although I was afraid to look at the label, I reached down to my inner strength and found much of the same horrible, artery clogging substances.
There you have it. Be afraid. Be very, very afraid. And now, I need to lie down for a while.
Quick! Someone get Byride a Viking Professional Range! (by the by, Vikin makes outstandin products!)
Move over RR, Byrdie is on her way UP!
Hey, while you’re tossing in stuff, Just, can you add a couple of SubZero’s too? LOL!!
@Byrdie you are AWESOME!
thanks for the report!
Just as suspected, her products are filled with unhealthy heart clogging crap y’all!
Don’t have much sympathy for “Jules”. Why is someone who claims to be an accomplished chef doing buying a Paua Deen pie from Walmart? Serious case of poor judgement. Play with fire and you’ll get burned. Paula Deen=crap and not just on a driveway.
Perhaps Jules is now working as a writing instructor…
Thanks for your devotion to the fine folks here at FNH. Was there “clearance” milk available to accompany Poopy’s mark-down desserts?
You deserve a fine bottle of Sauvigonon Blanc for your superb efforts in providing the unhealthy “nutrition” information about Pauler’s products. Mazel Tov!
Cherry, join me in a glass! Happy Friday!!
@Designer – I remember you had made a comment about sat fats, so I specifically wanted to find that info out. Glad to be able to inform so we all can stay around longer!!
Gotta love Pauler’s extensively photoshopped image on that website, nary a line or wrinkle to be found.
My bad. Not sat fats, but TRANS fat. Anybody that eats that knowingly is just crazy.
This is the type of food that would be good in a bomb shelter as it will not go bad.
Good point, Teague. Of course, even in the midst of nuclear desolation, I still don’t think I could choke down one of those fat-laden messes.
@Ferd I think I’d starve to death as well.
@Jillian did you ever let this accomplished-Walmart-pie buying-spellcheck phobic- alleged ‘chef’ know that she was talking to FNH, or was she thinking that one of the Deens was actually talking to her.
I can sort of see how some addle minded simpleton in a rush could get tins confused with an FN site…but it does take some sort of twisted mindset to think that this is Paula Deen’s official site.
this was hella funny. More like this. Please.
1.) Wal-Mart.
2.) Paula Deen.
3.) Nuff said.
The purchaser was expecting what? A Jacques Torres creation? You get what you pay for.
I demo’d Paula Deen’s pies at one of my stores and people gagged on it. Not cooked,,,raw. Sooo disapointed in thid product…no quality control. Paula..PLEASE get on the ball and take this off the market!
Lori, as long as people buy her crap she won’t remove her name (and the royalty checks) from any product, good, bad or indifferent. She would be cutting her own throat. What needs to happen is that the purchases that are crappy need to be returned to the store for a refund. If enough people do that, Wally World, or any other retailer or website, is going to drop her products. It’s the power of the dollar that will speak volumes!
I HAD THE SAME EXPERIENCE WITH MY PAULA DEEN APPLE PIE. I AM A PAULA DEEN FAN AND WILL EAT ANYTHING WITH A COOKED APPLE IN IT. SO MUCH SO THAT IT IS A FAMILY JOKE!!!THAT PIE IS RAW. I THOUGHT IT MUST BE PAR BAKED SO I TRIED TO COOK IT. IT WON’T COOK.
Sandy, calm down. Take a deep breath. Feeling a bit better?
Take the piece of shit pie back to the store where you bought it and get your money back. Remember, as a fan of Pauler you deserve ‘her very best from her to you’ blah blah blah. Or ‘her very best attempt to get your money’ or was it, ‘your very best dollars for a crappy product that I allow them to put my name on so I can pay for yet another house and more hairpieces and brighter choppers and…’
You’ve been take to the cleaners and you don’t even know your pants are off.
Next time, Sandy, break the prozac in half.
[...] of the Paula Deen apple pie she bought at Wal-Mart that she ran to her computer and wrote us a series of colorful e-mails. Since then, we’ve been getting dozens of letters from more – shall we say – [...]
Paula, Paula, Paula -take back your pie!
ditto – on the comments of a soggy pie.
We did salvage it! We cooked it in our toaster oven at 400 for about 10-15 minutes. It is now edible.
I have seen first hand how many pies that have come back and the comments are all the same. I too bought one and brought it back. Walmart needs to rethink their partnership.
I just bought a Paula Dean Rum Pecan Pie and it is beyond disgusting…..how can you screw up a pie so badly? It was so sickly sweet is made my teeth ache and to me had little to no pecan flavor…..just gross.
My hubby is eating a piece of the Paula Dean apple crunch pie as we speak…..he says it tastes ok, but the crust is very soft and mushy.
Paula Dean….your pies bomb, and for signifactly more $ than the other walmart pies they had sitting there….you get a big “yuk” from us and we certainly won’t be buying something with your name on it in the future.
I received a Paula Deen pie from someone else. I didn’t have the negative experience these people are talking about. I personally thought it was the most delicious apple pie I had ever had. If you check the ingredients online, it has applesauce listed. Maybe these people are not used to that in a pie. As for the crust? It probably could be put in the oven to finish baking to their liking. My family also liked the pie.
Yesterday, 2-4-10, my husband went to Wal-Mart and came home with the Apple Crunch Top Pie. It really looked good in the package but not when it sat on the plate. My husband is a marvelous cook and pies are his specialty. He is always looking for a new kind, flavor, etc. and when he say the Wal-Mart Special, he brought it home. The top crust looked and was delicious but the rest was a big disappointment. The apples did not have any flavor, they were soft/mushy, there were no spices detected (cinnamon), and the bottom crust was not cooked through. We are not going to eat the rest because we know we can do better by using Washington State Apples and a good receipt. We did not pay $7.50, it was on sale for $4.50. That price was way to high for what we got.
Paula, we enjoy watching your programs and getting new ideas for ourselves. But do become more diligent in what you put out to the public and do take our criticism to heart and make good decisions.