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Guy Fieri vs A Rock
---Ina Garten Storyline On 30 Rock
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Guy Fieri vs A Rock
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Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---Guy Fieri Rock n’ Roll Culinary Tour Set To Destroy America---Ina Garten Storyline On 30 Rock
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43 Responses
No question about it: Guy Fieri is definitely dumber than a box of rocks!
I agree, but I have a slight correction: A rock is useful if you use it to bash Guy Fieri over the head with it!
Off the hook, that’s money
@Busta: A paperweight is less gorey – LOL!
When Mr Ferry opens a new line with Global I guess it’ll be called either “baka yaro” or “kisama”
Lest we forget, the rock is better looking and has more personality.
Wait a minute, I saw a rock the other day with sunglasses on the back of it. Was that Guy?
Clare, that was Bob Doucheman pretending he was Doucheboy. He has a real problem with that…
a rock is both useful and light in weight.
Remember “Stone Soup”? A rock can also make a tasty meal.
Cm-on. Ferry isn’t that dumb. He is many other unpleasant things, but dumb ain’t one of them. He has managed to hoodwink and captivate many and at the same time, co-owns 2 restaurants and probably makes some pretty good coin.
This guy is probably as obnoxious as anyone on TV. We should be ashamed that we have allowed this doink to do what he has done and buy into his idiotic schtick.
We should be admonishing him and his Kulinary Krew for being a douche-bags and having little or no talent.
Quick Poll: Who is more useless?
A. Guy Fieri
B. Noah Starr
C. Kevin Baruch
D. Melissa D’Arabian
E. A rock
@Martin…I’d actually have to go with Noah Starr for this one. He’s too damn short to do anything of value. Guy and Melissa D’Preggo are at least good for poking fun at them and I don’t know who Kevin Baruch is.
Alton Brown’s co-host person on ICA.
Hah, nice post Jillian. I think Fieri is a tremendous dolt. I do love watching DDD though.
There’s something about this guy (Fieri)that people love. Beats me what it is but I thinks it’s his shorts.
@Kenneth — I have such a quandry with DDD. I can’t stand Guy Ferry and his slovenly (why, yes, I’d love to eat in a cafe which just had Guy in the kitchen! Love me some Guy drippin’s in my food!), pretentious, desperate and douchey ways, yet I like seeing most of the eateries featured on the show. I used to be able to watch it and, mostly, ignore him, focusing instead in the owners, staff and customers in the restaurants. However, over time this has become pretty much impossible. Haven’t been able to stomach watching an episode in a good while. Too bad, really. Wish someone else hosted it.
My daughter and I watch Guy sometimes to see what kind of food poisoning he is spreading on that day. Will it be e coli? Salmonella? Has he really never had a food handling class? It’s disgusting. Rinsing your hands in water, no soap, for two seconds does nothing but excite the bacteria.
@Busta_91 Kevin Baruch is the very useless floor commentator on Iron Chef America. But I agree with you that Noah Starr is the winner. Much less useful than a rock.
I was trying to connect a rock with a hard place – and then thought
eewwwww never mind
Doe he always have to have his mouth open?? I don’t get it. Catching flies maybe??
I kinda like “dumber than a sack of hair” but I am sure rocks will do.
Hey, don’t knock the rock!
You can use rocks to do basic math (1 rock + 1 rock = 2 rocks)
Rocks ARE interesting to watch (when you skip them across water)
The small ones ARE lightweight
and they are VERY useful for many things
Guy, on the other hand? Hmm…
That is the face he would make if I met him and shoved that rock up his ass -.-
Rock hard abs: Rock.
Stone cold sober: Rock.
I have found that I’m able to tolerate DDD for shorter and shorter periods as time goes by. I’m at the point where I can’t even stand the theme music! I don’t even want this guy on my television, he’s so unbearable! Totally unwatchable.
“That is the face he would make if I met him and shoved that rock up his ass”
Jennie, spot on! And he looks pleasantly surprised about it too! I wonder if he’s confusing constantly behaving and looking like a buffoon with displaying personality.
Firstly, rocks can be useful in certain instances. :)
Secondly, I though you guys might enjoy this clip of Sandra Lee using a spray painted chair as a centerpiece. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xs4zGujcSaA&feature=related
Thirdly, your site rocks.
Three pluses for the rock:
1. Is house trained
2. Does not emit foul odors
3. Can be turned into jewels
…which would then be worn by Ferry for BLING!
4. A rock does not wear sandals into kitchens where they make your food.
@Anon college student, Thank you for that precious clip. I have no second thoughts- aunty sandy needs therapy!
@Martin. Dude if you want to criticize Kevin Brauch, try and spell his name even remotely to how it’s pronounced.
I agree Brauch’s role going over the “rules” and how points are scored on ICA is pretty stupid.Theyneed to do this every show for slower people and those not familiar with the format.
He has also had a show on FN Canada, the Thirty Traveller which ran for 3-4 seasons and covered libations first , food second. The guy isn’t as versed as Alton Brown, but he is knowledgeable.
Your poll question was sort of useless IMO. I’d expect more from a “doctor”. Most likely your fibbing on that.
Oh Brauch has been to more countries and eaten more ethnic dishes than you’ve had hot dinners Bud.
Trini, I’m with you on that awful theme music. Gawd.
A rock doesn’t have jock itch and a ratty, greasy, peroxide dyed beard.
@Anon college student – thanks for the link to that clip. Only a crazy person drunkard like Sandra Lee would take an fine antique chair, ruin it by spray painting it and gluing fringes on it, and then place it ON TOP of a table as a centerpiece. Has she lost her mind or what??
@Martin: You’re being very generous. She never had a mind.
@MArtin,
If you want to criticize Kevin Brauch at least spell his name correctly.
I agree his contribution to ICA , describing how the judging goes down is sort of useless, but his food knowledge is solid.
He had a show in Canada called The Thirsty Traveller that ran for 3-4 seasons. Covered drink and food.
Now useless is your quick poll that sounds like it comes from a 15 yr old, not the doctor you claim you are.
Brauch has visited more countries than you’ve had hot dinners, Bud.
Sobering thought of the day: If Andrew Cuomo wins in his quest to be Gov of New York, she will be First Lady. Yeah, that’ll class up the place a bit.
I lost my PET ROCK 20 years ago, thought the dog ate it with the box! However, people told me it would show up!
@ Trini
I wonder if he’s confusing constantly behaving and looking like a buffoon with displaying personality.
Well that is what FN pays him for.
This is hilarious, but really, why give the rock an X for “interesting to watch. this would be SO much funnier if you give the rock a check for “interesting to watch” and give Ferry an X.
Why would I say that a ROCK was interesting to watch? It’s not. I don’t get your logic.