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Untrue Food Network Rumors: Rachael Ray Preparing For New Career As Swami
Published on: November 16, 2009 – 2:25 pm by Jillian Madison 
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THIS WEEK: Ina Garten's "beginner" recipes, new Food Network shows starting in September, thumbing through an issue of Semi-Homemade magazine, Rachael Ray's daytime talk show, Aarti's "accountability group", Claire Robinson on Big Daddy's House, another sensual reading of Alex Guarnaschelli's tweets, sink or swim voicemail, and much more.
Seriously, how can she “foodgasm” over an artichoke?
Looks like she is holding a seance…or imagining holding Giadas breasts.
Or waiting for huge sums of money to be dropped into her waiting arms.
Where the f*ck did she get that fugly frock?
What is that ugly muck on her plate? It looks completely unappetizing.
Seriously? She look’s like Sybil’s mom here!!!
Ooh ooh…except she for that unfortunate brown shag instead of the white coiffure.
Looks like she was in the middle of wafting the scent of her gross looking food.
Cherry Rose, it looks like a hideous sofa slip cover.
She looks really possessed.
Please assure me this was a photo shopped picture and that this is not really Ray Ray’s head on that body??
Arrrgggghhhhh….My EYES!!! Hideous and very green
she look like a cretinous midget.
creepy.
Nice shirt, man hands.
Quick! Where’s the “Emergency EXIT?”
“What is that ugly muck on her plate?”
I’m guessing that it’s a salad – a wedge of cabbage with mesculin and balsamic vinaigrette – but I can’t figure out that turd on the left side of the plate. What is it?
It looks like a roasted tomato slice or something along the lines of that.
Looks like dog poo. Hey, did Pauler make that for her?
*In a smoky, New Yorker, old, Jewish voice*
“Hello Bubbie. Would ya like some knish?”
“Looks like dog poo.”
Looked like a turd to me, too: Beer-batter-dipped and deep fried. LOL!
I’m just waiting for her head to start spinning.
@Cheryl: And, spewing green slime! Mr.CherryRose would tell you that this is what happened to me when I had an attack of Norovirus on a cruise ship in January! Visit the Forums for my true story…
Alex! Oy! She looks verklempt…
Looks like an artichoke and a piece of fried plantain…but that doesn not go together, so I must be wrong. As far as her dress, she needs to hire a stylist because she does not have a clue!
[Eyes the space cabbage on her plate]
So that’s what happens when somebody becomes a pod person.
She’s trying to make her salad levitate, apparently.
Mecca lecca high mecca hiney ho.
I think one of two things is going on given her color – She has been turned into a zombie, and is wishing there were bra!nz on the plate, or she got a good whiff of what she’s about to taste.
“Oy! She looks verklempt…”
Methinks she went meshuga!
Shhhhhhhhh….listen…..Is that strains of ‘Tubular Bells’ I hear in the background?
I could also hear her saying this:
nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah
da da da da, da da da da
da da da da, da da da da
da da da da, da da da da
I work at burger king
making flame broiled whoppers
I wear paper hats
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
I gotta run
I gotta run
I gotta run
I gotta run
Don’t bob for fries in hot fat
it really hurts bad
and so do skin grafts
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Where is the bell?
Wait for the bell
Can’t hear the bell
Where is the bell?
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
I work at burger king
making flame broiled whoppers
I wear paper hats
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Would you like an apple pie with that?
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Ding fries are done
Diiiing friiiiies aaaaare dooooooone
Alex- what kind of coffee do you drink? Just for mornings, just saying’….. Cool Job!
LOL. That is hysterical.
Looks liek the Exorist!!! May the power of Christ compelle you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Her meal looks like it came from the GB.
It’s a good thing Scripps bought the Travel Channel. Now they have the authority to command the Ghost Adventure knuckleheads to come an exorcise her ass.
Why is she green? Did she eat her own “food”?
It’s an artichoke on her plate – and while they *are* orgasmically delicious… they certainly don’t merit that level of (false) reaction. Especially before taking a f’ing bite.
She looks kind of green and I thought she was a zombie.