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Rachael Ray »

Untrue Food Network Rumors: Rachael Ray Preparing For New Career As Swami
Posted on November 16th 2009 by Jillian Madison

    38 Responses

  1. Miki says:

    Seriously, how can she “foodgasm” over an artichoke?

  2. Fobby Blay says:

    Looks like she is holding a seance…or imagining holding Giadas breasts.

  3. byrdie says:

    Or waiting for huge sums of money to be dropped into her waiting arms.

  4. CherryRose says:

    Where the f*ck did she get that fugly frock?

  5. Jill (not Jillian) says:

    What is that ugly muck on her plate? It looks completely unappetizing.

  6. PsyInFeld says:

    Seriously? She look’s like Sybil’s mom here!!!

  7. PsyInFeld says:

    Ooh ooh…except she for that unfortunate brown shag instead of the white coiffure.

  8. Zach says:

    Looks like she was in the middle of wafting the scent of her gross looking food.

  9. Syd says:

    Cherry Rose, it looks like a hideous sofa slip cover.

    She looks really possessed.

  10. MNLisaB says:

    Please assure me this was a photo shopped picture and that this is not really Ray Ray’s head on that body??

  11. Tallman says:

    Arrrgggghhhhh….My EYES!!! Hideous and very green

  12. she look like a cretinous midget.
    creepy.

  13. Sandra says:

    Nice shirt, man hands.

  14. BOO! says:

    Quick! Where’s the “Emergency EXIT?”

  15. CherryRose says:

    “What is that ugly muck on her plate?”

    I’m guessing that it’s a salad – a wedge of cabbage with mesculin and balsamic vinaigrette – but I can’t figure out that turd on the left side of the plate. What is it?

  16. Zach says:

    It looks like a roasted tomato slice or something along the lines of that.

  17. byrdie says:

    Looks like dog poo. Hey, did Pauler make that for her?

  18. Alex says:

    *In a smoky, New Yorker, old, Jewish voice*

    “Hello Bubbie. Would ya like some knish?”

  19. CherryRose says:

    “Looks like dog poo.”

    Looked like a turd to me, too: Beer-batter-dipped and deep fried. LOL!

  20. Cherylf2112 says:

    I’m just waiting for her head to start spinning.

  21. CherryRose says:

    @Cheryl: And, spewing green slime! Mr.CherryRose would tell you that this is what happened to me when I had an attack of Norovirus on a cruise ship in January! Visit the Forums for my true story…

  22. byrdie says:

    Alex! Oy! She looks verklempt…

  23. wannabecook says:

    Looks like an artichoke and a piece of fried plantain…but that doesn not go together, so I must be wrong. As far as her dress, she needs to hire a stylist because she does not have a clue!

  24. Squarebob Spongepants says:

    [Eyes the space cabbage on her plate]

    So that’s what happens when somebody becomes a pod person.

  25. Ferd Berfle says:

    She’s trying to make her salad levitate, apparently.

  26. Deven says:

    Mecca lecca high mecca hiney ho.

  27. serutan says:

    I think one of two things is going on given her color – She has been turned into a zombie, and is wishing there were bra!nz on the plate, or she got a good whiff of what she’s about to taste.

  28. CherryRose says:

    “Oy! She looks verklempt…”

    Methinks she went meshuga!

  29. suebee says:

    Shhhhhhhhh….listen…..Is that strains of ‘Tubular Bells’ I hear in the background?

  30. Alex says:

    I could also hear her saying this:

    nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah
    da da da da, da da da da

    da da da da, da da da da
    da da da da, da da da da

    I work at burger king
    making flame broiled whoppers
    I wear paper hats
    Would you like an apple pie with that?
    Would you like an apple pie with that?

    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done

    I gotta run
    I gotta run
    I gotta run
    I gotta run

    Don’t bob for fries in hot fat
    it really hurts bad
    and so do skin grafts
    Would you like an apple pie with that?
    Would you like an apple pie with that?

    Where is the bell?
    Wait for the bell
    Can’t hear the bell
    Where is the bell?

    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done

    I work at burger king
    making flame broiled whoppers
    I wear paper hats
    Would you like an apple pie with that?
    Would you like an apple pie with that?

    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Ding fries are done
    Diiiing friiiiies aaaaare dooooooone

  31. BOO says:

    Alex- what kind of coffee do you drink? Just for mornings, just saying’….. Cool Job!

  32. GreenJeans says:

    LOL. That is hysterical.

  33. hairball says:

    Looks liek the Exorist!!! May the power of Christ compelle you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  34. suebee says:

    Her meal looks like it came from the GB.

  35. byrdie says:

    It’s a good thing Scripps bought the Travel Channel. Now they have the authority to command the Ghost Adventure knuckleheads to come an exorcise her ass.

  36. Kevin says:

    Why is she green? Did she eat her own “food”?

  37. numb says:

    It’s an artichoke on her plate – and while they *are* orgasmically delicious… they certainly don’t merit that level of (false) reaction. Especially before taking a f’ing bite.

  38. She looks kind of green and I thought she was a zombie.

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