Guy Fieri »
Last week, Rachel Syme at the Daily Beast interviewed me about Guy Fieri. She was trying to figure out why so many people seem to hate him these days. A few of my quotes were used in the article, but I thought I’d post my full response here to shed some light on why I, and so many others, hate Guy Fieri with the fire of 1,000 suns:
I’d be happy to help shed some light on why so many people loathe Guy Fieri. Here’s the thing: people dislike him for about 100 tiny reasons, all of which ultimately come together to form one huge fiery ball of hate. It’s not just because he eats like a farm animal and chews with his mouth open. It’s not just the sunglasses stretched to their breaking point on the back of his meaty neck, the douchy rejected frat boy haircut, or the juvenile Twitter messages that look like they were written by Miley Cyrus (Kewl! c u krazy kats at da kulinary kitchen!)
Somewhere along the line, Fieri morphed into an overbearing, sweatband-wielding caricature of himself. He has an 8 year old’s vocabulary and a 14 year old’s wardrobe, and yet he walks around town thinking he’s a rockstar… surrounded by a posse of middle aged men who somehow manage to be even more pathetic than he is. Thankfully though, at this point, even SNL is beginning to realize his shtick is more lame than my grandmother’s left knee.
Even worse, his real last name is FERRY, which makes his ridiculous “Fi-etti” pronunciation of his name even more obnoxious. People can spot fake a mile away, and they don’t respond well to it.
I could go on forever, but here’s the bottom line: I don’t think anyone with even a modicum of intelligence wants to watch a 41 year old man with bleach blonde hair and dirty flip flops running around a kitchen screaming about how “money” a piece of cod is. Somebody should tell Fieri that saying “bad boy” 12 times in 15 minutes doesn’t make you “kewl.” It makes you a moron.
Do you hate Guy Fieri? Tell us why in the comments.
(And by the way… if you see this thing in your town, run for your life.)
Other posts on Food Network Humor:---Laugh Of The Day: Clueless Guy Fieri PR People Asking FNH To Promote His Products
---5 Things Guy Fieri Could Do To Be Less Of A Douche
---Things That Exist: A Guy Fieri Face Trivet
---Guy Fieri Stole Paris Hilton’s Sunglasses For His “Costco Connections” Photo Shoot
---Guy Fieri Now Selling $140 Meat Pack At Costco
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