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Food Network Christmas Cards: 2009
Posted by Jillian Madison

    44 Responses

  1. Ben says:

    Impossible to pick a favorite. Seriously hilarious. Nice job Jill!

  2. Dan says:

    The Giada one is epic. Poor Todd. Constantly living in the shadow of those boobs.

  3. Gayle King says:

    Laughed the whole way through. Great post!!!

  4. Jenna says:

    Every one of those Food Network people should see this post. It is freakin’ hilarrrrious. Away Ina Manger had me on the floor.

  5. CherryRose says:

    Very clever, Jillian! All awesome, but the “Away Ina Manger” is my fave.

  6. christellar says:

    *thumbs up* fine holiday fun

  7. Andy says:

    Away Ina Manger is my favorite as well.

  8. Zach says:

    The paula one looks pretty legit, i think we should all be very afraid.

    Great job Jillian.

  9. Great post Jillian. I love the rayray card. Her face in that cracks me up.

  10. Sandra says:

    “Away Ina Manger” is my favorite! Hilarious! Her face on the baby Jesus’ body is just too funny. I’m catholic but I’m not offended at all.

  11. BOO says:

    OMG- did anyone have a flashback on Ina’s to Rosemarys Baby?

  12. byrdie says:

    Well done, Jillian! You captured the true essence of each!

  13. Judith says:

    Jillian: Joto ichiban i.e. Good, number one.

  14. Kristyn says:

    I was pretty fond of the Rachel one. LOL.

  15. phil says:

    I cracked up, would have still gone with Paula’s hash tag Merry Christmas to y’all and to y’all a good night.

    Jillian you always make me laugh.

    • Dave says:

      Paula’s y’all is tired. It’s not even really a schtick anymore. It’s just getting…. old and tiresome. I much prefer Grease On Earth.

  16. suebee says:

    Wickedly hilarious!

  17. martin says:

    I must say that Rachael’s husband looks more and more like a hobo every day! He is absolutely disgusting.

  18. Elizabeth says:

    Half the cards watermarks say foodnetworkhumor. The other half say fodnetworkhumor. Might want to fix that. Hilarious though!

  19. Karell says:

    Dang, I wish this post came out earlier. I would totally have sent the Paula one.

  20. DerekLutz says:

    Giada’s husband gets the gift that keeps on giving the whole year, to paraphrase Cousin Eddie.

  21. Lissa says:

    I would seriously use the Alton Brown card, it’s that awesome.

  22. Cole Slaughter says:

    These are hysterical!

  23. oh_come_on says:

    Very very funny Jillian :)

  24. LaLa says:

    Away Ina Manger was the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while!

  25. lostinplace says:

    HO HO HO!

    Whoopsie, no Aunt Sandy card, save that title for later!

  26. Dave says:

    Just wanted to say I laughed my ass off at this. I love this site.

  27. Tyler Peel says:

    Giada’s Christmas card is obviously a step above the others, though all are great!
    That fact that her head is cut off (something we’ve always assumed anyway) and the focal point of the picture is on her bodacious ta ta’s.

    “No Tyler! It’s Tahhhh Tahsssszzzz! A-NOUN-SEE-ATE with me… tahhhh tahssszzzz” Giada scolds.

    But her ta ta’s are not the main focus of card, but rather Todd. Jill didn’t tell us what the caption inside the card is so we can only wonder?

    a) Ah Pookey, please let me play with the girls? Puhleeze!
    b) Yeah… dats right boyz… they’re all mine.
    c) “Hi, I’m Mr. Di Laurenti… ah fuck I still can’t spell it, I’m Giada’s husband… remember me? Anyone?”
    d) “Mama Mia… I gots yer canneoli right here!”
    e) “Todd who?”

    I’m betting that 90% of the staff at Scripps has already received a copy of this posting in their email box. This is probably the most widely distributed picture at Scripps this year.

  28. JoJo says:

    Is it just me or does Anne Burrell look like Phillip Seymour Hoffman when she is silver?

  29. Slowmodem says:

    Excellent! Thanks for the smile!

  30. Alex says:

    The Alton Brown one is my favorite. I would have loved to see “polyphenols” somehow added to that.

  31. Sajib Malalaoo says:

    new underground footage on ‘BlueTube’ of Flay and those crazy deen Boys. Find out what they are REALLY famous for. HINT: one of them could be on Man vs Food for his footlong hotdog abilities.

  32. Foodie says:

    I get it, but I guess I don’t watch enough Food Network TV to find these “hilarious.”

    But Epic? No way.

  33. abebush says:

    Has anyone ever noticed, that Rachael Ray’s husband looks HORRENDOUS in every photograph he’s in? Not only that, but he always looks like he’s in pain in every photograph too. Like he’s been constipated for a month or something.

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