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An Argument Against Buying Guy Fieri’s Books
Published on: December 14, 2009 – 3:38 pm by Jillian Madison 
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Guy Ferry – er, Fieri – nay, Fietti – seems to be the Food Network’s man of the hour. His latest book More Diners, Drive-ins, & Dives, just hit #1 on the NY Times Best-Seller List in the oft competitive <cough, sarcasm, cough> Paperback Advice category. This exciting news comes mere weeks after Fieri was labeled a “culinary rockstar” by two out of touch journalists who wouldn’t know “cool” if it bit them on the ass.
Sadly, it’s not unusual for successful people to have their signature styles emulated. The following series of photos depicts the dreaded – and very real – FERRY EFFECT, and outlines what would happen if the men of the Food Network started copying Fieri’s look simply by purchasing a widely available piece of Flair Hair:
Yikes. It probably wouldn’t stop at the Food Network hosts, either. If the FERRY EFFECT was strong enough, it might start to infect Food Network spouses as well:
And after awhile, not even their pets or their otherwise well dressed gay best friends would be immune.
So do the world a favor and think twice before buying that copy of Guy Fieri’s book. It’s a slippery slope, people. Do we really want to go down that path?
And better yet, do we really want to do that to poor Isaboo? Hasn’t she endured enough?
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---Guy Fieri-ish Flair Hair Visor---Guy Ferry. Never Forget!
---Guy Fieri Totally Looks Like A Gay Bulgarian Singer Named Azis
---Why People Hate Guy Fieri
---Oregon Hates Guy Fieri
THIS WEEK: Ina Garten's "beginner" recipes, new Food Network shows starting in September, thumbing through an issue of Semi-Homemade magazine, Rachael Ray's daytime talk show, Aarti's "accountability group", Claire Robinson on Big Daddy's House, another sensual reading of Alex Guarnaschelli's tweets, sink or swim voicemail, and much more.
You guys are too funny. Hall of Fame post.
Very funny! However, I regret to inform you that in the FN spouses section, you left out Jeffrey Garten. Imagine how funny he would look in that get up!
You are right. And I’m going to fix that little blunder right now – and add one of TR Pescod just to really drive the point home.
Thanks for that Jeffrey comment. Looks hilarious!
Gosh, thanks! Now I can die knowing that I have actually seen Jeffrey Garten, renowned president of Yale School of Business and recongized expert in foreign economics in spiked bleached blond hair and orange camo. Dude…he ROCKS!!!!
Giada’s hubby never looked better (or is that hairy?).
I thought the same thing. I bet he’d be glad to wear it considering he’s balding slightly, if I do recall.
Was at an FYE store shopping this weekend looking through movie soundtracks while Christmas shopping and I saw the soundtrack to Diner, Drive-ins and Dives. Seriously, there’s a soundtrack to the madness?
OMG!!! This made my day. That guy from Ace of Cakes looks the part of a total douchebag. Well he does normally, but this brings it home.
Jeffery never looked so, umm, ‘hip’! (snicker)(”how badboy can that be?!)
I can only hope that one night in the near future, Isaboo catches up with Doucheboy in a dark alley…
Oh look! Theres Giada and her WONDERFUL (and disturbingly effeminate) husband, Todd. Nice tight shirt, Todd. It better be a wet suit of sorts or you’re really confused.
Jillian,
Ina’s ‘favorite husband’ IS there….isn’t that TR? Cutie!
The RayRay snaps are wigging me out. The boobs in the 1st one (very round-looking) and the pageant-doll smile with Isaboo — WTH?
I was going to say, a lot of those folks look better with the “Ferry Do.”
We all know it’s a “Ferry DON’T!”
Wearing the hat makes each of them look like their I.Q. just dropped a couple dozen points at least.
Oh not – not the poor defenseless dog ! Such cruelty !
Guy the Ferry looks like Heat Miser from “Year Without a Santa Claus”.
you’re a photoshop master
So much for Fieri’s fake hair hats, I like the boobs on Rachel..ya think those are real? Hey and the shot of Paula and hubby, where’d Paula’s facial wrinkles go?
I noticed that too MB, about Paula. I can’t imagine how much photoshopping time is set aside for the turkey neck. And what’s up with the makeup/fake tan, and also add in the incredibly unnaturally white teeth. Ewwwww.
Its crazy but duff actually looks better with that thing on his head…it hides the ugly.
Please, please take that thing off Alton’s head. It’s hurting my heart.
@Brown Sugar: I feel you! Poor AB!It’s hurting my heart too!
TR is SO hot. Too bad I could never be his type…unless I had a sex change…:(
Thanks for adding Jeffrey–he was the one who made me LOL!
Why wouldn’t it surprise me if Duff took the visor off and started using it to scratch his ass? I keep getting this gross image in my head.
Photoshop Genius!
Jeffrey: “This is an interesting pattern on this visor. Kind of abstract…what do they call that, Sweetie?”
Ina: “I’m not sure, Honeybunch, but it’s the same pattern that’s on the briefs that TR strips down to after he’s had a couple of my pineapple margaritas at our bridge parties…and for some reason, Mi-GUEL always puts on a silly set of deer antlers…oh, it’s just a HOOOOOT!!!”
Dayum. I just found this site and love it! It’s my X-Mas gift to myself. I actually met Fieri as I live in N. California. Let me tell you, his nail beds need a good scrub.
Oh…GROSS!!!
Can you imagine Jeffrey Steingarten wearing one?
Rachael ought to get that bizarre spot on her right b00b checked out immediately!!
TR still looks hot!
isaboo RULES!!