Guy Fieri »
LIVE BLOG: Minute To Win It (3/21/10)
Published on: March 21, 2010 – 7:00 pm by Jillian Madison 
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This is what happens when a girl who hates Guy Fieri is bored on a Sunday night, and decides to torture herself by watching NBC. Welcome to our spur of the moment Minute To Win It live blog!
8:00 pm: The first contestant is a hair stylist. Great. I know exxxxactly who his next 2 clients should be.
8:02: Last week, Mark won a whopping $2,500. He’s on level 3, and is about to play a game called “Speed Eraser.” I can only assume it involves Lindsay Lohan.
8:04: Sadly, “Speed Eraser” was just a middle-aged man trying to bounce pencils into a glass as Guy Fieri stood in the corner annoyingly egging him on. Now *that’s* what I call entertainment.
8:07: This show is awful. I don’t know if I can endure an entire hour of this. I’m just saying.
8:08: One of the studio lights just bounced off of Fieri’s pinky ring and partially blinded me in my right eye. Like my grandmother always said, “never trust a man with a pinky ring.”
8:15 pm: The level four challenge is called “Bucket Head.” The guy has to bounce ten ping pong balls off of a plastic wall into a bucket on his head. You know what that means: this show one plastic nose filled with green boogers away from being DOUBLE DARE.
8:17: Okay, the guy lost. Guess he didn’t practice the idiotic game at home enough, eh?
Anyway, here’s the next contestant. Her first challenge is called “This Blows.” Ironically, that’s exactly my opinion about this show right now.
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We interrupt this review to bring you opinions from Twitter users who are currently watching Minute To Win It:
Just discovered NBC’s “minute to win it”…how is this even worth the production costs? What a waste! -ElleLaMode
Guy Fieri is not a good host – it’s like he doesn’t know how to react to the contestants. -patlaeger
“Minute to win it” is basically just a show about what people do when they’re drunk. -MeganHobson
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Really, Megan Hobson? I’ve been drunk a few times, and never once did I say “Hey, let me put an Oreo on my eyeball and try to WIGGLE IT INTO MY MOUTH.” Imagine the crumbs! Can you say “corneal abrasion?”
Guy Fieri just said, “Oh, she’s doing the shake. No one’s ever done the shake in all the time we’ve been doing this.” Uh, THE SHOW IS BRAND NEW. No shit you’ve never seen anyone doing it.
8:28 pm: We’re a half hour into the show. Prize money given away: 0. Brain cells lost: 3,245.
8:30: The next challenge involves a woman in a blindfold groping around for some small orange balls. Or as Guy Fieri calls it, “a rockin’ Friday night.”
The contestant failed to complete the challenge, so now we have to WATCH HER TRY IT AGAIN. After the commercial break, of course. Is it 9 yet? I want to watch Cyndi Lauper crumble under Donald Trump’s questioning again.
8:43: Guy Fieri just explained the challenge by saying, “she has to grab onto two balls which are very easy to get off.” Whoa now. Is this a game show or the plot of the newest Debbie Does Dallas flick?
Oh. She lost again. She only has one life left. Too bad she’s not a cat.
After her 3rd try, the woman finally completed the stupid ball challenge. And of course, more commercials. I guess SOMETHING has to pay all the props on this shitty show.
8:53 pm: Sadly, the contestant couldn’t keep two feathers airborne by blowing on them for 60 seconds. And so, with a few pumps of his fist, Fieri ended the show by “dancing” and doing the white man’s overbite with the contestant.
Well folks, I can honestly say that hour was torture, and I wouldn’t watch this show again unless you gave ME a million dollars. Game over, the end.
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---NBC Kicks Off “Minute To Win It” Promotion With Series Of Obnoxious Guy Fieri Photos---Minute To Win It Totally Bombed In The Ratings [Surprise, Surprise]
---First Photos Of Guy Fieri On “Minute To Win It” Set
---NBC Renewed “Minute To Win It”
---Next Food Network Star #508: LIVE BLOG
THIS WEEK: Ina Garten porn, Giada's gone Chinese, a review of Giada's Parmesan Garlic Dipping Sauce, Paranormal Cake Challenge, Down Home with the Neelys and Gina's rude sister, NFNS recap, tons of listener mail, and more!
Is he wearing a lee press on bra???
And get a load of that gut!
Seriously, does he have something on an NBC exec to be named as host of this crap-fest of a show?
The Speed Eraser was obviously faked or something the first time through. On the first round, he kept trying to bounce off of the pencil tip! Of course, when he did it on the eraser the second time, he beat it!
Stupid guy listened to his greedy ass ho wife, look at him now! Should’ve taken the 5g.
Oh Dank – “greedy ass ho wife” HEHEHEHE… I long to be one of those elite ho’s some day!
NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!
the close ups of this woman moving an Oreo from her forehead to her mouth???? is this a game show or “People Who Look LIke They Have Palsy”?????
OMGosh this is even ickey-er than i imagined.
and Guy is even worse than i could have believed…
Between this broad tongue-ing that cookie into her mouth, bobbing for bags (tea bags?), and now spreading out on the floor, I’m getting horny.
DANK!!! get a hold of yerself, it’s a Guy show!!!!!!
i am not sure there is enough red wine in my home (city? county? state?) for me to consume to continue watching this load of….
Men should never wear pinky rings!!!
The only men who wear pinky rings are Elvis impersonators. And have you noticed that Ferry never wears a wedding band? Guess he’s still trying to look like a studly.
I never noticed that. More reasons to not like him
When I was pregnant and super bloated, I used to wear my wedding and engagement rings on my pinky. Maybe thats Guy’s wedding ring on his pinky, because he’s just been really bloated… for the last several years.
Hey NBC, since you are obviously into airing annoying programs, why not devote an entire hour to someone scratching their nails on a chalkboard? It would be more watchable than “Minute to Win It.”
LOL!
Oh, Jillian, you are a brave woman with a strong stomach.
Dang funny commentary, though!
Does Guy look like George W. Bush to anyone else? I swear if you put a blond fright wig and a bowling shirt on W, you’d have Guy.
Ha! I never would have thought of that, Mystie, but now that you mention it, YES. Scary!
Um, no.
I don’t know how you did that, I can’t even watch the commercials for that crap fest.
Thanks for your supreme sacrifice, Jillian. I am toasting you with a BIG glass of vino! :)
I tried to watch. I really did! I. Couldn’t. Do. It.
In the few minutes I was able to force myself from changing channels, I noticed the fake audience MUCH more than the few minutes I was able to watch last week. Sooooo Lame! Production cost on Minute to Win It < $10,000.
Can hardly wait for next week!
*yawn*
I opted to watch that Discovery Channel program today instead of this.
And now I see I missed exactly jack shit by not tuning into this show. My hypothesis was correct!
I think the show is not so bad. It is better on DVR when you can skip through most the stuff that isn’t that actual challenge itself.
Jillian, girl, you need to stop with the ’spur of the moment’ blogs! No fair! I was all over other really bad reality TV shows at the time, and had no idea otherwise I’d have been all over it like white on rice. I need a heads up. Plus, what’s this new, fandangled thing called, ‘Twitter?’ Shit, I’m too busy trying to keep the macaroni in my EasyMac to remain aldente. And let me tell ya….it ain’t easy. It’s a science.
Yes, I know what Twitter is..I was being sarcastic. Just preempting all of those Debbie Downers out there who can’t recognize sarcasm when they see it. :)
is it really a secret why NBC’s ratings are in the toilet.
I didn’t know it was on last night, or I would have watched (TRIED to watch).
Just reading the commentary caused me wincing pain, though…
I pity the poor losers that dream up these challenges in the first place. Next week they’ll have one where you have to tie a knot in a cherry stem with your tongue.
I have better things to do with my time than watch this
sh!t. I’d much rather read Jillian’s blog!
Forgive me, Jillian. I wasn’t slamming you with my last comment. I think you’re a brave woman to have to endure watching this crap for your faithful followers at FNH. I, for one, thank you for that.
My wife teaches at a nursery school. She got some great ideas from the show. Sorry folks, both she and I liked it.
And THAT says more about the show than I ever could.
The show’s tanking. #’s are Nielsen Ratings
8:00
CBS, 60 Minutes, 3.2
FOX, The Simpsons, 2.8
ABC, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, 1.7
NBC, Minute To Win It, 1.6
8:30
CBS, 60 Minutes, 3.2
FOX, The Cleveland Show, 2.5
ABC, Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, 2.2
NBC, Minute To Win It, 2.0
At the risk of asking a stooopid question, these numbers are from last night’s airing?
Yes. Sorry, should have included the source.
http://tvbythenumbers.com/2010/03/22/tv-ratingsncaa-overrun-boosts-cbs-amazing-race-undercover-boss-strong/45587
Sweet!
(and, thanks for the link/details)
Hope you’re somewhat recovered, Jillian. Talk about taking one for the team!!
I wonder how long this douche will be on NBC? His tenure at Food Network seems to be a lock. I’m just waiting for them to rename it ‘The Bloated, Bleached, Middle Age, Loser Network’.
UGH
i get that you cover the food network, but god damn have some self respect for your eyes
I’m surprised that you would skip The Simpsons in favor of some overgrown manchild douchbag who hosts a lame-o game-o show-o in which people try to show why they make this country look bad. But, you took one for the team and that’s to be appreciated.
A prescription will be a daily doses of episodes of the Simpsons and Family Guy. That way you’ll feel like a billion dollars. :)
Maybe it’s the sinus medication I’m on, but I just had thought, “I bet Ina could host this show.” The promotional line could be, “Only grab the good balls. How easy is that?” Plus, we could see her black denim billow as she glides gracefully across the stage.
Win!
I think he’s filmed a few too many episodes of “Triple D” (eye roll, groan). What a fat, greasy load! He’s practically glistening under those studio lights. I can only imagine how rank he smells.
I think Guy Fieri’s the man. Say what you will about his hair but that’s an entertaining dude. He takes Minute To Win It from good to great.
>>>> a woman in a blindfold groping around for some small orange balls. Or as Guy Fieri calls it, “a rockin’ Friday night.”
In his small orange dreams, maybe.
This has to be the best site ever.
I googled “Guy F. What’s the appeal” and this site came up I am so glad to see I am not the only one that is puzzled by this guys presence on TV. I have almost stopped watching Food Channel because it seems every time I tune in he’s on. Can’t stand him for all the good reasons listed here.
I went to the taping the other day and the host of Double Dare was there. I was so excited! Who’s watching the premiere tonight on nbc?