Sandra Lee »
A Closer Look At A Semi-Homemade Show Intro
Published on: April 18, 2010 – 10:18 am by Jillian Madison 
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(From Semi-Homemade episode: April Showers)
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---Semi-Homemade Icing---FIRST LOOK: Upcoming Semi-Homemade “Homecoming Tailgate” Episode
---Semi-Homemade: Was That A Transvestite?
---CAPTION THIS: Semi-Homemade Eating Light Episode
---Sandra Lee’s Semi-Homemade Bra Fail
THIS WEEK: Ina Garten's "beginner" recipes, new Food Network shows starting in September, thumbing through an issue of Semi-Homemade magazine, Rachael Ray's daytime talk show, Aarti's "accountability group", Claire Robinson on Big Daddy's House, another sensual reading of Alex Guarnaschelli's tweets, sink or swim voicemail, and much more.
This ain’t funny. Sounds like a real show! Looks like something she would show only with “prettier” names. They look like the end result of most of her dishes. LOVE the boots on the counter with flowers in them! NOT!!! JUST AS DIPPY AS USUAL. I think maybe RR gave her these recipes and she just changed the slant on them. Both are BOOORRRING and repulsive.
Haha…agree but I don’t think Aunty Sandy is boring…she’s immensely eye-catching…just like a train wreck you can’t stop looking at!
The only thing eye-catching about her is her boobs..I am always mesmerized by how loooooow they hang! I know she has a long torso but jeebus, those puppies must bracket her belly button.
LMAO @ “a cake made by a blind 4 year old.” What’s up with the flowers in the boots on the counter.
I grew up being told it was bad luck to set shoes on a table, so boots on the counter? Hmmmmm. Maybe on the porch.
Her whole tablescape was boots filled with silk flowers, hideously ’sweet’. And of course her giggly googly glee over her cocktail. Aunt Sandy’s looking as narrow through the hips as anorexic Robin what’s her name.
That was from her “Save it for a rainy day” episode. Since it was raining, it was okay to break out the 20 year old bottle of Scotch at 10AM and drink it out of pair of pink galoshes. (The bottle she was saving for when she became a TV success)
oh my god I was dying when I saw that hahaha
i started to watch this episode whilst on the treadmill the other day. the intro alone was revolting enough to get me off the ‘mill and back to the weight room!!!
“fast” family food? sooooooo….. Sandra dahling, just how long DID it take you to frost a cake that looks like it was baked by a blind 4 year old????
and flowers in boots…..i am completely out of words—-
*hic*!!
Ew vomit! It looks like it.
Someone needs to take Aunt Sandy shopping for a bra. Those udders will soon be touching her knees if she doesn’t get some support soon.
Too funny! and true.
My husband has always called her “two hung low”.
Wonder why no ‘lift’ when she got her face rejuvenated.
Forget breasts — they look like swinging pendulums in a grandfather clock.
That ‘entree’ looks revolting! Who else besides Aunt Drunky would even consider it? I say, fill the boots with the vodka – you’ll need that much to get that meal down!
I don’t think there are enough flowers. Need more tacked to the cabinets. Seriously, how is it I can still see after looking at those pictures?
I use to watch this tool for the humor. now, scamdra just down right bothers me. Hey, you good folks in New York… If Cuomo runs for governor, please, please do not let that whore in the governor’s mansion!
Yeah, the flowers in rubber boots, sitting on the counter top? I don’t know anyone who could pull that off without seeming like a looney toon.
And “fast FAMILY food” – including cocktails?? Some for the kiddos too, I guess?
The vomit has googly eyes. They’re looking at me!
Creepy much?
For reasons unknown to me my husband loves watching her money saving show. the episode we just got done watching was about mexican food, in the end all the crap she made cost 20 dollars. i turned to my husband and told him i could buy about 30 tacos from taco bell with that 20.
The birthday cake was so sad. Her aunt somebody used to make it for her year after year (she even had photos). It was frosted on top of an overturned aluminum cake pan (which was also decorated with icing). If that’s a happy memory she’s seriously in need of counseling, but we already.
In that second picture is she demonstrating what she did to get her show?
Either that, or she’s pretending to be a water fountain. It looks like a stream of water should be spewing from her mouth.
In the 4th shot she looks like she’s about to yack up one of her own veggie-vomit napoleons. I can certainly see what she likes about Andrew Cuomo – bug eyes and nostrils big enough to stand up in. Beauty!
He ain’t exactly a looker uh ? It’s not the bulge in the front of the pants, it’s the back pocket bulge I think .
AND WTF with the cake tins? Cut away half the cake so it goes on top of the tin… WHY?? Then ICE THE TIN??? WHY??? You were so poor growing up there wasn’t enough food (commercial pimping for Share our Strengths) but you could waste half a cake and ice an aluminum cake tin?
I finally figured it out! Heidi Montag Pratt from “The Hills” is aspiring to look like Aunt Sandy. They both have the same horsey-looking jaw and face and give Heidi a few years and her fake boobs will be hanging down just like Sandy’s!
I thought the same exact thing!
OmG! This made me spit my coffee on my computer screen. Right when I got to the cake shot!
Come on people, be nice! Sandra needed those boots for her super fresh ingredients! Scraped just this morning from the bottom of her sole. And when squeezed, those juicy foot liners add a creaminess and tang that just can’t be found anywhere else.
That ain`t right…..
Anyone noticed how Aunt Sandy likes to lean forward when she’s giving her opening monologue? It’s rather unnerving.
This is not in relation to this episode, but I saw one of her shows where she was going to put something into the microwave for one and a half minutes. For some reason the camera did a close up of her pressing the buttons on the microwave and she pressed 1, 5, 0. Sorry, but that is NOT one and a half minutes. She must have had cocktail time BEFORE the show.
BTW, Jillian, when I first read this, the “cup of coffee with floating animal claws” made me laugh out loud! WTF is that, anyway? There’s no soup I know of that is quite that color.
Cream of Asparagus, but I wouldn’t eat it.
A true classic from Aunt Sandy. I froze on the couch when this episode came on. Why? Why must we pipe icing on an upside down disposable pie tin? Why must we mount our cake on an upside down disposable pie tin? Why must we hack off half the cake in a half-assed effort to balance it on an upside down disposable pie tin? The mind, it boggles.
My husband has always called her “two hung low”.
“Mound of Vomit on Veggies” Bwahahahahahaha!!
Can someone send Sandra a bra with a lift in it? Hers are starting to sag to her belly button!
Seriously, what is that crap on top of the tomato?
You know, I have never seen her show, so today, I’m sick from work and decided to have a go. You’re right, it’s terrible.
Today she made CARRRRunchy TiLLLLLLLapiAAAHH TAHcos, and they were SUPPPPER SIMPPLLLLE.
I couldn’t watch the whole thing. Didn’t even get to the cocktails, and THAT is what I was really looking forward to.
OH and I forgot to mention the “tablescape”. That bitch had the nerve to slice up some post-its. YES, POST-ITS, and put them around the underside of the serving plate, so it would look “festive”. It was BOOTYFUHL.
omg That crafty bitch actually used rain boots as her decoration. I never thought a pair of wellies could be so useful! And that pink frost actually looks like pieces of chewed up bubble gum.
Have you ever noticed how low her boobs are? They look like they should be 5 inches higher on her body!!
Someone owe’s me a keyboard… I can’t stop LAUGHING!