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Guy Fieri Doesn’t Know Where To Sell His Knuckle Sandwich “Knifes”
Posted on April 22nd 2010 by Jillian Madison

guy-fieri-knifes

Um, how about outside an elementary school, so one of the 3rd graders can teach you how to spell “knives?”

What sort of chef doesn’t know the difference between KNIFE and KNIVES? You’ve got to be KNIDDING ME.

(via Guy Ferry’s Twitter)



Other posts on Food Network Humor:

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---Is Rachael Ray’s Santoku Rocker The Ugliest Knife Of All Time?
---Guy Fieri’s On Twitter
---Meat & Potatoes Geography Fail
---Cal State Disses Guy Fieri

    67 Responses

  1. Kenneth says:

    Well, at least his userpic is money.

  2. Patrina says:

    Douche, apparently he has some sort of appeal that talented chefs don’t.

  3. Alex says:

    I think he’s appealing because everyone feels less stupid when he’s around.

  4. Spatuler says:

    This is too coincidental because just earlier tonight I was wondering which FN “personality” I would love to give MY knuckle sandwich to (yes, I actually was thinking “knuckle sandwich”) Swear to god. And yes, it was Guy, as always. Color me freakin’ out a little bit over here. I think I need a vacation from FNH for a while. Yikes.

  5. CantSayWhoIam says:

    I think he should sell them in a facility for the blind. That way, no one will know how hideous the freaking things are.

  6. MASCAR-PONAY says:

    Dollar store much?

    • Karen says:

      Sadly, his survey doesn’t have that option, or I would have voted for it. Either the Dollar store, Big Lots, or the area flea market.

      • Laura says:

        Why would you insult the Dollar Store and Big Lots like that? They do have some standards…haha

      • Hakuna Fritatta says:

        LOL I was going to say there must be a flea market somewhere around Santa Rosa. Come to think of it, Santa Rosaians probably have too much taste for that. Mebbe out of the back of a pickup in a parking lot on Wilson Way in Stockton? I bet there are a lot of potential knife buyers in the area.

  7. Justin H says:

    Are those the hideous ones where he ripped of the New England Patriots’ design?

  8. Lana says:

    Guy’s learned how to use bit.ly. I’m so fucking proud of him.

  9. Alex says:

    Guy Fieri needs to get punched in his vagina.

  10. Mystie says:

    I want to slap him for the misspelling, but I also want to slap him for using the term “411.” Can I get two slaps, please?

  11. natalia says:

    well it’s no better than tyler florence’s horrible grammar…

  12. Freezezzy says:

    How about MetroKitchen.com?

    There’s an ad for that website on this page with a picture of a knife on it.

    Free shipping!

  13. Motzi Greps says:

    sTOopId iS as sTOopId dOEs.

  14. Specsmachine says:

    I bet those suckers would sell like hotcakes in a trailer park or in the parking lot of a wrestling match. He’d be making money hand over fist!

  15. ralsteve says:

    It doesn’t surprise me one bit. The guy’s a MORON.

  16. BOO says:

    I’m sure a copycat Jeffrey Dahmer will show up with a use for!

  17. CherryRose says:

    Why not just toss the “knifes” into the audience on “Minute To Win It”? No one wants to buy Ferry’s knucklehead knives, but I’m sure his fans would love the freebies.

    • Alex says:

      “Why not just toss the “knifes” into the audience on “Minute To Win It”?

      Literally?! ;)

      • bon appetit says:

        I’m not sure how effective that would be, aren’t some of the audience members actually cardboard pictures? Would be fun to watch in any event!

    • Ray says:

      Better yet, have him toss a big ol’ handful of them straight up in the air over his head. And make sure he’s rooted in place so he can’t move. “Tonight, Guy gets a painful lesson in the law of gravity!”

  18. Gypsy says:

    WTF is a knuckle sandwich knife anyway??

  19. Sarah says:

    Please neuter this asswipe now.

  20. oh_come_on says:

    Come on FN, where’s the Fieri package? FREE knuckle-knife when you buy a revolting bowling shirt, sweat bands, neck sunglasses, hair dye and gel and commemorative ‘bling’.

  21. Teague says:

    Can we really be surprised?

  22. Scruffy says:

    I didn’t know he could just call Williams Sonoma and say “hey, sell my knives.”

    I think they would probably say “uh, no.”

  23. Di says:

    You know, I think Guy is literate enough to spell “knives” – but, on the other hand, I think he is dumb or disinterested enough to let illterate people speak for him on twitter.

    Heh, can YOU spell “tomatoe” (D.Quayle)

  24. JoeV says:

    Here’s a suggestion for Guy: You can sell your knifes at that depressing drive in movie/flea market on the south side that specializes naked Bratz dolls sold by the pail, Nazi memorabilia and misprinted WWJD bracelets.

  25. Whaaaaaaa says:

    Wait, maybe I am a dumbass but is there some inside joke behind Jillian’s spelling of “kidding”…she spelled it “knidding”. My inclination is to think that it is purposely misspelled since the whole post is a post about misspelling but I don’t know…I’m confused!!

    • HeWhoseNameMustNotBeSpoken says:

      You are not a dumbass but you have proven yourself as too naive to breed, therefore you will submit your genitalia upon the woodblock…you will now be neutered with a Guy Ferry K.H.K Special.

      • Whaaaaaaa says:

        That’s all well and good but I’d like to see how you plan on neutering a female with “knifes”…Regardless, I am sure Sandra Lee could make a recipe out of the remains…

  26. Katie says:

    He makes me want to punch a puppy.

  27. Silvio says:

    I’d like to go a couple of rounds with this piece of chit.

  28. Jess says:

    …is anyone else offended that he refers to himself as “ChefGuyFieri?” Who in the hell told this guy he was a chef?

  29. Jimmy Johnson says:

    Technically, I’m a chef too as I have cooked for other people once or twice.

  30. Chris says:

    In the second grade, a girl in my class mispronounced knife. She said, “Ka-nif.” She was humiliated by the teacher. I wish the same on Guy Fieri. Fucking toolbag.

  31. Lemon says:

    I bet his parents named him “Guy” becaue it was easy for HIM to remember it, he doesn’t look like the brightest bulb out there

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