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Closed Captions »

The Food Network: Closed Captioned
Posted on June 25th 2010 by Jillian Madison

Did you ever watch the Food Network closed captioned? We have, and it can be hilarious! The best part? The captions are real – we didn’t even have to make them up. Here are our favorite grabs from the past week:



Other posts on Food Network Humor:

---The Food Network: Closed Captioned (12/18/09)
---The Food Network: Closed Captioned
---Anne Burrell: Closed Captioned
---Aaron McCargo, Closed Captioned For The Grammatically Impaired
---Bobby Flay’s Wife On Grill It

    59 Responses

  1. Motzi Greps says:

    Did Sandra Lee borrow one of Ina’s shents and cut holes in the arms?!?

  2. Syd says:

    I’ll have to take Claire’s word, but it looks like she knows how to handle that knob.

  3. BOO says:

    I heard Aunt Toddie say that! Guess she had to drink the first bottle she opened!!

  4. GreenJeans says:

    Loved Anne’s big sausage. Could not help but wonder..was it brown?

  5. BOO says:

    Hey y’all, with Bobby in love and all, I wonder if Ol’ Putter will be having a wedding at her new address. Greaseland!

  6. Antony says:

    Paula’s so orange, she looks like she ate one of those “Three course dinner” sticks of gum in the Wonka factory that she was warned not to eat, since the Sweet potater pie course wasn’t quite right yet…

  7. skidv25 says:

    I watched yesterday’s episode of Semi-Homemade, and I couldn’t stop laughing after Sandra told herself not to waste the champagne! Thanks for capturing it! :)

    • atdleft says:

      Is it just moi, or were last week’s “Semi-Edible Sh*t” episodes extra appalling? I don’t know what was worse, the “crepes from a can” in the “Vury Churry” episode or the “enchiladas from a can” in the “Fiesty Fiesta” episode. I almost felt like throwing my ottoman at the TV in pure rage! How can ANYONE call that BS “cooking”?

  8. Gypsy says:

    Yeesh…is it just me or is Sandra looking corpse-like?

  9. Robert says:

    I’ve never loved Claire Robinson more.

  10. FNFAN says:

    The most amazing thing about all of these is that Bobby has a GIRLFRIEND! I mean, when I saw that episode the other day it completely threw me for a loop.

  11. BorgQueen says:

    You made a mistake. Caption #4 belongs in picture #5.

  12. Sandra Lee's Liver says:

    Just love Aunt Sandy’s dark roots. Time to get out the Miss Clairol…or perhaps she drank that too!

    • Silvio says:

      Speaking of roots, Giada is gonna need a major tuneup soon. Her appearances on NFNS show she hasn’t kept up. Getting Elviraish.

      • oh_come_on says:

        Giada’s not so flawless looking in real light, real sun. Guess her perfectly angled, perfectly filmed episodes showing her ‘best side’ isn’t protocol on NFNS, or in her Target ad.

  13. BrerMatt says:

    Today is a rough day, Jillian, but FNH makes me smile. Thanks!

  14. Mac says:

    I was watching an old episode of Paula Deen’s show the other day and have to say I MUCH prefer the old Paula. This newly tanned, neon-white teeth, starched look is off-putting.

    Claire Robinson and the pepper mill had me LOL!

  15. Chris says:

    Why doas Pauler always have to make that STUPID effin` face?

    It looks like a reaction to someone stickin` a stick of butter up her cooch!

    Or maybe it’s her reaction to one of the Dean boys sittin’ that close to a girl!

    • Fabio says:

      concordo, i miglioramenti grcifai sono notevoli ! l’unico tallone di achille il design, che a parer mio non buono .uffi che peccato !Fermo restando che il lavoro svolto in fase di programmazione dai ragazzi di high voltage ammirevole, guardando i video di the conduit si nota che cio che offre questo motore grafico di sopra pure a metroid corruption, ma il problema che con il design da loro scelto non si riesce a vedere tanto; che al di sopra degli standard ( di tutti almeno per ora )lo si nota soprattutto quando mostra i colpi di luci e texture su mani.Sarebbe bello poter vedere questo motore grafico all’opera in un gioco come call of duty; in quel caso vedremmo davvero il gap tecnico che c’ tra questo motore grafico e tutti gli altri giochi che fino ad ora sono usciti su wii. E pensare che non ancora il max che puo dare su questa console, perche evidentemente possiede ancori molti margini di miglioramento ..e questa la dice lunga . mario galaxy,metroid corruption, smash brawl e call of duty world at war son l’aperitivo, the conduit solo l’antipasto quindi .

  16. dennylou says:

    The picture of Claire Robinson makes her look rather tranny-ish. Check out her “man hands”.

  17. anjarew says:

    According to Paula Deen, a balanced-diet is half butter, half cream.

  18. Angela says:

    Isn’t that Brooke next to Bobby Dean? Maybe Brooke has a sister that Bobby’s borrowing for the show.

  19. FuryOfFirestorm says:

    I bet she’s Bobby’s “girlfriend”, all right…

    “Girlfriend please! You just jealous cause I look better in these jeans than you do!”
    “Hi-hi-hi, Girlfriend! Let’s go shoe shopping and get plastered on daquiris!”
    “Hey girlfriend! You need to get your hair did!”

    NTTAWWT

  20. gongo95 says:

    Gotta love Pauler, I have to agree with her this time

  21. oh_come_on says:

    Bobby’s ‘girlfriend’ is Katy Mixon, an LA actress. Pauler’s quote should be, “My son is in love, and I’m so happy”…. we could hire Katy to act like Bobby’s gal.

  22. atdleft says:

    WOW! Has this been a wacky week on FN, or what? I was nearly traumatized by Aunt Sandy’s worst “suuupppr smmmpl russipeeez”, but then I found some “Secrets of a Restaurant Chef” episodes and Chef Anne totally turned my frown upside down. And that’s just the start…

    I don’t often get to watch much weekday TV, so it was fun to spend some of last week watching FN with y’all. ;-)

  23. Voice of Reason says:

    PAULA CATCHES A HAM WITH HER FACE!

    “I DIDN’T KNOW THEY WAS GETTIN THROWED Y’ALL!”

  24. Hal says:

    I wonder if the closed captioner for Ina’s show has how easy was that auto-filled so they can just click and paste it?

  25. REKS says:

    LOL…The picture of Bobbie and his women..LOL..yeah OK bobbie your straight, most uncomfortable moment for you and the viewers…LOL…Bobbie once you go black, i bet you never went back.

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