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Barefoot Contessa: the Jeffrey Garten Birthday Episode
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I didn’t catch this weekend’s episode of Barefoot Contessa. Luckily, an FNH reader named Amber did – and as an added bonus, she sent us pictures! Gold star for you, Amber!
Anyway, it was Jeffrey’s birthday, and Ina took him out to celebrate. The first place he wanted to go was to his favorite store… MECOX!
Just to clarify, not Yourcox… not Hiscox… but MECOX.
I had never heard of this Mecox place, so I decided to check it out on the internet. According to their website, they are “dedicated to achieving an overall balance between the indoor and outdoor living environment.”
FNH translation: it’s a home furnishing store that specializes in selling OVERPRICED, UGLY SHIT.
Example #1: They want $1500 for a busted “coffee table” that looks like it was previously used to store cement blocks at Home Depot.
Example #2: $1300 for a painted aluminum bear? Are they smoking crack? I’d pay $1300 to never have to look at that thing again.
Example #3: Who would pay 700 bucks for a musty looking wooden snake from 1969? Unless you’re a snake charmer, there’s no excuse for having something this hideous in your home – let alone paying $700 for it.
Sorry, I won’t be “adding anything to my Mecox” today. Or ever.
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- Ina Garten
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LISTEN TO THE LATEST PODCAST: Episode 20
THIS WEEK: Another tailgating weekend! Alex G's onion rings, an awful slow cooker experience, Ina & Jeffrey Garten's lame steak throwdown, Jennifer Hudson's annoying Weight Watchers commercial, Restaurant Impossible's cheap makeovers, and more.
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45 Responses
(first!)
Hiss you got ripped off! Very funny.
I can find better stuff driving around the neighborhood on garbage day!
LMAO, MECOX. It had to be Jeffrey’s favorite store because I’m assuming Ina has better style in furniture.
I will forever be amazed at the absolute shit you can get rich people to buy if you call it trendy.
“$1300 for a painted aluminum bear? Are they smoking crack? I’d pay $1300 to never have to look at that thing again.”
Wiping ice tea off the keyboard! Too funny!
Remember, the Gartens live in the Hamptons- the people there take “keeping up with the Joneses” to an extreme. If I spent $3000 on a solid gold trash basket, then my neighbor will buy a $30,000 platinum trash can studded with diamonds.
Then I’D buy a $300,000 solid platinum trash truck encrusted with diamons, emeralds and rubies to throw your paltry little trash cans around!!! ;)
Utterly ridiculous… only the rich.
I’m excited others found ‘Mecox’ as hilarious as I did. I think this site is fantastic and I check it regularly (I found it several months back after Googling ‘Alex Guenishelli’s ass’). Keep up the excellent work!
OMGEEZLES! That is EXACTLY how I found FNH!
ROFL @ storing blocks of cement at Home Depot.
I’ve been reading your comments to my DBF and he’s laughing so hard he might dislodge his stent. LOL
LOVE THIS SITE!
I wonder if Jeffrey’s apartment (during the week) is decorated in these overpriced Salvation Army leftovers?
And his gold plated iPod is full of Prince, Simon And Garfunkel, and John Tesh.
Ah, yes, John Tesh…the King of “Cheese” LOL
No one ever accused Jeffrey of having good taste.
I won’t say the obvious …
The absurd wood and iron coffee table is something right out of Unhappy Hipsters.
I think the duo from “American Pickers” is behind this!
I actually watched this episode yesterday because she was making some childhood favorites of mine (matzo ball soup and stuffed cabbage). But the part where she drops Jeffrey off at the bookstore features almost a solid minute of her nervous laughter and just the most awkward parting of two people I’ve ever seen. It was actually uncomfortable to watch – I was wishing Jeffrey would just go in the damn bookstore and make it stop!
“But the part where she drops Jeffrey off at the bookstore features almost a solid minute of her nervous laughter and just the most awkward parting of two people I’ve ever seen.”
Something just ain’t right about these two…I won’t make the mistake of calling Jeffrey gay again, but the Gartens have an awkward, almost forced, relationship. Just my opinion. (I still think Ina’s doing the Swedish chick who made her the flower boxes.)
It’s Jeffrey. He’s just not a camera-ready kind of guy. Ina’s friends–gay or straight–can engage in marginally snappier repartee. But Jeffrey can’t so Ina tries too hard and laughs for both of them, so much so that I muted the sound (I still have closed captioning). They should only show Jeffrey putting food in his mouth and nodding–like, once a season, if that.
Stoup – I also think that Jeffrey has light loafers in his closet!
Livia, THANK YOU!! I knew I wasn’t the only one who thought that.
Once people become so rich, they.will.buy.anything.
This fact is made obvious by the fact that the Mecox website sells “Concrete sculptures” for $2,800…. they look like debris from a building demolition. Epic fail.
Holy Shit.
Ina I THINK Jeffery is trying to telling you something.
Jeffery isn’t getting enough. He wants some priceless excitement. Yeah, I can fantasize with that friggin snake.
That table is the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. Ok, maybe not THE ugliest, but pretty damn close.
Did you see the 13K rocking chair under functional art? Aside from it looking painful… it looks painful.
“FNH translation: it’s a home furnishing store that specializes in selling OVERPRICED, UGLY SHIT.”
BWAAAHAHAAA!!!
That little fucking Hobbit!
Exactly!
After a second look at that weird snake thing, does it look to anyone else like a really long, horribly shaped pile of shit?!?!
how he got through ranger school baffles me
must have paid cadre
Good for Mecox! They have a thriving business based on ripping off silly materialistic people with no taste. I’d like to dig some crap out of my basement, tie it together with rope, call it functional art, and go to work for them.
Sadly, I’m thinking Jeffrey has more money than sense. I’m also thinking that Ina must oversee the decorating because we don’t see hideous crap like that in their home.
After reading the latest FNH post, I had to go to Mecox website and see what else was there. (Curiosity vs being a true stalker, of course.)
As thus I found this.
http://www.mecoxgardens.com/pageItemDetail.asp?RECORDID=11389
For $1500.00 I can hang a piece of art… and I’m pretty sur Ina will too after reading the description
“Sun in the City” Original Art DESCRIPTION:Original Acrylic on Canvas by Gayjohns.Can be Hung Horizontally or Vertically” How fabulous is that?
I thought an item had to be a hundred years old or more to be called an antique? All they did was slap an “antique” moniker on that crappy piece of 60′s lawn junk and give it a 99% markup! If you’re dumb enough to spend that much money on it you deserve to be ripped off.
I was valet parking at a Hamptons house party, and the owner bitched out a co-worker of mine, for accidentally knocking over a lawn gnome, that he…and I’m quoting here…”paid 1200 motherfucking dollars for!” My friend didn’t even break the ugly piece of shit, he merely bumped into it and it fell on the grass! I’ve lived on Long Island all my life, and from the rich douchebags my Aunt worked for in Locust Valley, to the rich pricks I did valet parking for in the Hamptons or landscaping for in Old Brookville…….. they all had one thing in common………ugly fucking houses filled with ugly overpriced bullshit I wouldn’t put in a bus depot!
I heart Jeffery.
That coffee table is bad ass – a bit steep in price, but I’d consider it. The other stuff, however, is garbage.
http://www.mecoxgardens.com/pageItemDetail.asp?RECORDID=11449
WHo buys this crap?!!
So sorry that all of yournoble po’ folk litter your home with Chinese shit from Wal-Mart and the Rooms to Go.
Hiss you got ripped off.
Aha. That just made my day.
BTW has anyone seen the vintage marble stone torso on the website?
[...] Nutella. I am so obsessed with this European wonder, in fact, that my friend Matea and I are planning a Nutella-themed brunch we’ve deemed, “Jeffrey’s Brunch.” Yes, The Barefoot Contessa is our idol. And yes, we hope Jeffrey loves our brunch as much as he loves overpriced, ugly furniture. [...]