Alex Guarnaschelli »
VIDEO: A Sensual Reading Of Alex Guarnaschelli’s Tweets
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If you follow @guarnaschelli on Twitter, you know the woman’s descriptive food tweets border on soft porn. And thus, the idea for this feature was born. We originally recorded the audio for the Food Network Humor Podcast, but here it is again – set to video – for those who may have missed it. Enjoy!
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---A Heartwarming Selection Of Alex Guaranschelli’s Most Fattening Tweets---Anne Burrell, Robert Irvine, and Alex Guarnaschelli Will Compete To Become The Next Iron Chef
---The Alex Guarnaschelli Zombie Photo
---Food Network Humor Podcast: Episode 18
---VIDEO: Sandra Lee Reading An Excerpt From Her Book “Made From Scratch”
- Alex Guarnaschelli
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(c) 2011 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
We are not affiliated with the Food Network, or any of their hosts, in any way. This is a satire, humor, and parody website.
(c) 2011 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
24 Responses
Dreaming of taking her cornflakes and spraying them with warm yellow piss and Then taking a hot steamy dump on her cozy expensive couch!!!
Did I happen to mention that I can’t stand this woman???
Those were great!
I would like to like Alex, but her voice and attitude make it impossible to watch
She really loves her cookies. Yes that’s a double entendre.
Stop STOP!! I’m crying from laughing so hard :)
Thank you captain hyperbole. Its not that funny.
This reminded me of the Love Letters video by Liam Sullivan:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kGvtne2zfo
hehe love it!
Yet another reason why I deeply hate this woman.
This is so utterly brilliant and humorous!
Soooo… she smokes weed and then Tweets.
She’s got a decent looks husband- wonder how she managed that! She always looks like she smells something nasty! Hearing this made my skin crawl! ICK!!!!
“She’s got a decent looks husband- wonder how she managed that!”
Maybe he knocked her up? Or he likes her pillow talk/food porn?
She probably puts out a lot, since you only need something sweet to really get her going.
“Not tonight, I have a headache.”
“Oh really? Because I just so happen to have a cherry ice-cream sundae…”
“Oh my god. Oh, my GOD. The TARTness of the CHERries and the CREEEEAMiness of the ICE cream and the CONtrast of the WARMTH of the CHOColate sauce and the COLD CREEEEAMiness of the ICE cream, it’s just…UH!”
“So…in the mood now?”
“Only if you don’t disrupt my eating.”
Polly, I wonder if she combines eating and sex like George did on Seinfeld? Wouldn’t surprise me, coming from her!
Jillian you do that too well!
Sounds like she’s been getting into Sandra Lee’s famous cocktail-made with chocolate, cherry, coconut, pomagranate lobster
i feel dirty after listening to that.
I’m a little turned on right now.
As far as the warm pie goes, hasn’t she ever seen that scene in American Pie? I mean, GOSH.
You know this just shows how obsessed with food some ppl are. That background music is hilarious. Talk about porn grade ever listen to the music on the older Giada and Ina shows.
She just HAS to know that people are going to make fun of her tweets. How could we not? :D
Guarnaschelli obvious lack of both a constant and unyielding supply of food and sex has spawned one of the best videos on this site. God forbid this woman ever owns a vibrator..made of cookie dough.
I saw an episode of Real Sex once that showed all these british people “sploshing” like, in order to get turned on, they had to sit on cakes or roll around in chocolate syrup. Could you even IMAGINE this wildebeast of a woman finding out about such a concept? She’d never leave the house! That stay at home husband would have to get a job because she would be licking the sheets clean!
Does anyone else notice how the cameras avoid showing her from the waist down? She looks like the top half of her body is fairly normal and her bottom half exploded.
Hello, I’m new to this site having found it by mistake. Man you guys are hilarious. I’ll never view the Food Network the same way from now on.
Please keep up the Alex sensual/porn readings. I can’t stop laughing.
How much does a chef make exactly? I see she tweets many times within the same week/month and she uses very expensive ingredients like lobster on almost a daily basis. Plus lives in Manhattan?