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The Funniest “Dark Chocolate As A Snack” Recipe Reviews
Posted on February 2nd 2011 by Jillian Madison

Last week, we introduced the world to a wonderful little Ellie Krieger “recipe” called DARK CHOCOLATE AS A SNACK (if you’re not familiar with it, you should be because it’s a real life changer. As it turns out… you can EAT dark chocolate! AS A SNACK, even!)

When we posted the article, there were 5 lone comments on Food Network’s website. Now, there are 125 reviews – many of which should be shared with the world because you guys are totally hilarious (that, and it’s only a matter of time until Food Network deletes them).

So now, we proudly present: THE FUNNIEST “DARK CHOCOLATE AS A SNACK” RECIPE REVIEWS!


Other posts on Food Network Humor:

---RIDICULOUS FOOD NETWORK RECIPE OF THE WEEK: Dark Chocolate As A Snack
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Ellie Krieger’s Dark Chocolate Dipped Pretzels
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Ellie Krieger’s GLOVE COMPARTMENT SNACK
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Dried Fruit and Nuts
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Hungry Girl’s FROZEN WAFFLE FRIES

    50 Responses

  1. Janet Foster says:
    February 2, 2011 at 3:44 pm

    Funny as hell!!! The last three are hilarious.

    Reply
  2. Kelley says:
    February 2, 2011 at 3:49 pm

    ROFLMAO!!!!

    “No one snack should have that much power” had me laughing so hard my husband was looking at me funny. Good job peeps!

    Reply
  3. Susan says:
    February 2, 2011 at 3:52 pm

    OMG! Number two is hilarious!!!

    Reply
  4. RigaToni says:
    February 2, 2011 at 3:52 pm

    “Am I going to die?” For the win.

    Reply
  5. Food Network Humor » The Funniest “Dark Chocolate As A Snack … — Daily Great Food says:
    February 2, 2011 at 5:14 pm

    [...] Food Network Humor » The Funniest “Dark Chocolate As A Snack … Related Posts:Dark Chocolate as a Snack « Yow Yow! Instead of detailing a recipe for the readers of the Food Network, the website has suggested “Dark Chocolate as a Snack .” First it was …Afternoon Snack: The Best Dark Chocolate I've Had in Ages: Vitamin … Afternoon Snack : The Best Dark Chocolate I've Had in Ages. Comments Post a comment Friday, 01/21/2011 2:03 PM. Are you a chocoholic? I'm 9 …Food Network Humor » Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week … It's Friday… that means it's time for Food Network's Ridiculous Recipe Of The Week! This one comes to us from Sara Moulton's old show, Cooking …Food Network Has Done It Again! | Dlisted The purveyors of gourmet cuisine at the Food Network are once putting your culinary skills to the test with their latest recipe: "Dark Chocolate as …White Chocolate Snack Mix – Tasty Kitchen White Chocolate Snack Mix. Added by galinthemiddle on January 22, 2011 in Candy, Desserts. 0 votes, average: 0.00 out of 5 0.00 Mitt(s) | 0 … Categories: Eat, Real, Recipe, Recipes, The, chocolate, or, snack, to, you Tags: dark, eat, ellie, ellie-krieger, introduced-the-world, not-familiar, real-life, snack, turns-out, wonderful-little, world [...]

    Reply
  6. RR's Pompoms says:
    February 2, 2011 at 5:15 pm

    My bad. Read these at work. Thank goodness I have a door I can close. Bad thing is that there’s a connecting door between me and boss.

    BuckFutter and Salty Licorice? Love the names.

    Reply
  7. Nick says:
    February 2, 2011 at 5:28 pm

    The first and last are the best!

    Reply
  8. Beckishes says:
    February 2, 2011 at 5:34 pm

    These are hilarious, too bad Food Network will probably go all bitchy and delete them.

    Speaking of chocolate, I hear that FN is having a special called “Chocolate Covered Weekend” or some shit like that…with THE NEELYS hosting. I don’t know whether to call racism or douse my brain in bleach to get rid of horrible mental images.

    Reply
  9. Plumpy says:
    February 2, 2011 at 6:16 pm

    It would behoove Mr. Bob Tuschman to carefully read these hilarious comments in order to familiarize himself with wit and talent.

    Reply
  10. Alex says:
    February 2, 2011 at 7:37 pm

    Aww… it redirects to a real recipe now :(

    Reply
  11. Hippy_Longstocking says:
    February 2, 2011 at 7:56 pm

    first two are the best but all made me chuckle

    Reply
  12. Ryan T says:
    February 2, 2011 at 8:13 pm

    How dead inside does the person who made the decision to redirect this recipe have to be to not find any humor in these? You can’t tell me the catatonic at FN who read these wasn’t laughing. Oh right… they’re above criticism and reality, I forgot.

    Reply
  13. Diane says:
    February 2, 2011 at 9:22 pm

    All were funny, but that last one was hilarious!

    Reply
  14. Amber K says:
    February 2, 2011 at 9:48 pm

    LOL, people are hilarious :)

    Reply
  15. Mark H88 says:
    February 2, 2011 at 11:21 pm

    A lot of those replies are a bit old and hackneyed but there were definitely some creative ones. The last one is definitely the best. Kinda reminds me of something Homer Simpson would say.

    Reply
  16. James says:
    February 2, 2011 at 11:54 pm

    Man! I’m disappointed that I couldn’t get the real recipe! I was looking forward to having dark chocolate as a snack….now what will I do????

    Reply
  17. Miss N says:
    February 3, 2011 at 1:14 am

    Total win to ‘BuckFutter’ for the Kanye reference!!

    NO ONE COMMENTER SHOULD HAVE ALL THAT POWER!!!

    <3 yeezy love!

    Reply
  18. RosieB says:
    February 3, 2011 at 2:53 am

    Oh wow, there are over a hundred reviews and they are all funny! (Well, I’ll admit, I didn’t read all of them…but the 20 or so that I perused were at least chuckle worthy.)

    The best part: This is now the second most popular recipe on the FN site!

    Kudos to you beautiful people!

    Reply
  19. ron says:
    February 3, 2011 at 10:55 am

    They should just redirect the entire network to the fuckin shit heap!

    Reply
  20. welcome to ABBYnormally.com says:
    February 3, 2011 at 11:01 am

    [...] Food Network Humor: Dark Chocolate as a Snack Reviews {the beef jerky comment is the best} [...]

    Reply
  21. Sterson Jo says:
    February 3, 2011 at 1:37 pm

    beautifulrobot ftw

    Reply
  22. ladycrim says:
    February 3, 2011 at 5:46 pm

    These are all hilarious, but the last two are the best!

    Reply
  23. Jeff says:
    February 3, 2011 at 7:15 pm

    Unfortunately it looks like FN removed this recipe. If you search for it, it shows up but when you click it redirects to Cherry Almond Clusters… :-(

    Reply
  24. Neuf says:
    February 3, 2011 at 7:48 pm

    Haha! I’m glad mine made the list. :)

    Reply
  25. oh_come_on says:
    February 3, 2011 at 11:46 pm

    Cowards — reminds of their lightening-fast removal of Ellie’s fast-food-makeovers. Big Mac becomes chopped Big Mac salad — ICK!

    Reply
  26. Lara says:
    February 4, 2011 at 1:27 am

    I went to take a peeky weeky and guess what. I have to be signed in to see the recipe. Really? Really? Is it that much of a closely guarded family secret?

    Reply
  27. SriRini says:
    February 4, 2011 at 11:26 am

    And FNers said Nigella’s “perfect boiled egg” was rubbish..well at least it requires boiling-on-the-stove with magic tips of matchstick.Love the recipe of oxygen one..but both was ROFL!

    Reply
  28. wendylosangeles says:
    February 4, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    so, I just clicked on the original recipe that was posted, and it takes me to “Cherry Almond Chocolate Clusters”?. is it me, or did FN actually change the recipe? LMAO!! my favorite review was the lady who shaved off parts of the chocolate, fell over and “will put a cushion down next time”. I’m literally sitting in my office crying laughing..!!!

    Reply
    • Snarky says:
      February 8, 2011 at 7:08 am

      Yes – Food Network changed the recipe…and removed a few month’s worth of comments pertaining to the original recipe!

      Reply
  29. Peanut Butter Fingers » The Hunger Games says:
    February 9, 2011 at 11:01 am

    [...] Awesomely Funny Responses to “Dark Chocolate as a Snack” Recipe (FoodNetworkHumor.com) [...]

    Reply
  30. Don M says:
    February 14, 2011 at 12:48 am

    someone posted:

    “Unfortunately it looks like FN removed this recipe. If you search for it, it shows up but when you click it redirects to Cherry Almond Clusters… :-(”

    Uh… OK, you see, the recipe was… dark chocolate: at it. *^(*&^&* the clusters. Of course, this sort of thing always descends into a cluster ^%*^&, doesn’t it. :-)

    And actually, I do. Eat dark chocolate as a snack. Or Snack (praise be upon him). 100% baking chocolate, about an ounce at a time, because I read somewhere it was healthy.

    Just FYI re: “am I going to die?”, at least I FEEL like I’m going to die when I eat it. It tastes like the oaky part of wine without the joy of the grapes or the alcohol.

    A couple warnings they left off the recipe:

    1) Do not attempt to prepare the dark chocolate while operating heavy machinery. In fact, don’t do ANYthing while operating heavy machinery, except operating heavy machinery. People could die.
    2) Do not consume if product appears to have been tampered with. For instance, gnawed opened and half eaten by by wild nutria (swamp rats).
    3) Do not attempt to create Dark Chocolate at home. Consult a licensed professional candy manufacturer for appropriate packaging and mark-up.
    4) Dark Chocolate as a snack was removed because the project was classified, and is now run by the Department of Homeland Security, National Chocolate Tasting Center (NCTC). For more information, Google DCaaS or visit some fringe web sites. Do not accept FN’s dark chocolate “cover-ups”, even if you happen to have fresh long-stem strawberries or a dipping apple. Especially if they ask you for your email address or zip code. Food Network Knows Where You Live.
    5) Make sure you get DARK chocolate, not DANK chocolate. I bought mine on sale and thought it was just a mislabeling. Boy was I wrong.

    Reply
  31. jailmedic says:
    March 4, 2011 at 12:07 pm

    OH. MY. GOD!!!!! I think I actually peed a little.
    This is some funny SHIT!

    Reply
  32. kissmybroccoli says:
    March 6, 2011 at 1:16 am

    [...] I feel pretty ridic posting this as a recipe, but hey I’ve seen worse…anyone seen Ellie Krieger’s Dark Chocolate as a Snack recipe? Food Network actually took it off the site so I had to search it out. View the super complex recipe here and check out some hilarious reviews here. [...]

    Reply
  33. Butter Toffee Almond Butter | kissmybroccoli says:
    March 6, 2011 at 1:18 am

    [...] I feel pretty ridic posting this as a recipe, but hey I’ve seen worse…anyone seen Ellie Krieger’s Dark Chocolate as a Snack recipe? Food Network actually took it off the site so I had to search it out. View the super complex recipe here and check out some hilarious reviews here. [...]

    Reply
  34. What to Do With Your Hair When You’re Too Busy to Wash It | Kumarious says:
    March 12, 2011 at 10:25 am

    [...] (Although I feel like a fraud for posting “Instructions” – it’s like I’m telling you how to eat dark chocolate as a snack) [...]

    Reply
  35. Kumquat says:
    June 22, 2012 at 11:21 pm

    It’s not politically correct to call it “Dark” chocolate. You have to call it “Slightly Less Milky” chocolate. Come on, Ellie.

    Reply

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