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Next Food Network Star »

Alton Brown Will Be On Sunday’s Premiere of Next Food Network Star
Posted on June 3rd 2011 by Jillian Madison

It’s that time of the year again! No, not time for Sunny Anderson to strap on a fannypack and start talking about blunts and joints like the good ol’ Hot 97 days, but time for 15 of the country’s most annoying people to compete for a shot to get paid a crappy salary, sign their lives away to Scripps Networks, and become a corporate slave for the Food Network. In other words, SEASON 8 OF NEXT FOOD NETWORK STAR!

The premiere is Sunday night, and of course, I will be recapping every episode for your viewing pleasure. And if that’s not enough to get you to watch, how about these teaser photos from the episode featuring Alton Brown? Apparently, the exuberant and annoying “Fit Chef Katy” tried to jump over a table but ended up knocking down an entire tray of food. Classic.

And dare we ask what horrific sight befell upon Alton’s eyes that caused him to make THIS face? Time will tell, people. Time will tell.

Next Food Network Star contestants, remember! Don’t talk to Food Network Humor! I’m a bad, bad, evil monkey of a person!

And Food Network, you’re welcome for the free advertising.

See you Sunday night!



Other posts on Food Network Humor:

---Dear Alton Brown, The Internet Is Worried About You
---America’s Best Comfort Foods with Alton Brown
---Alton Brown Donates $100 To FNH; Offers To Match Pledges Of Other Food Network Hosts
---The Story Of One Fan’s Ridiculous Alton Brown Encounter
---Alton Brown Is Right: Man vs. Food Is Gluttonous And Disgusting

    34 Responses

  1. Pepper says:

    If Alton grabbed the fruit out of that bowl and started hucking them at the counter-jumping cheflette it would make my dreams come true.

  2. kellyjoy says:

    I’m excited for this only because it’s always such a train wreck!

  3. Suzette says:

    I wasn’t going to watch, but now I will have to tune in to count the number of times Alton rolls his eyes at this bimbo. Maybe he can teach her how to spell “challenge”.

    • Ferd Berfle says:

      If he’s so disgusted, why is he hosting the show?

      • FuryOfFirestorm says:

        It’s called a “paycheck”, Fred! 8^)

      • Sue Z says:

        probably a contractual obligation tied to the rest of the work he does for FN.

        and there’s just something that tells me that being neck-deep in the chaos there would be as amusing as being the armchair quarterbacks that we are — maybe moreso. I’d bet AB sees it as much of a spoof of “reality” as the rest of us do (c’mon, he contribute$ to FNH, he’s one of the Good Guys)

  4. Eurodancemix says:

    “Hey look, Alton, I can sit on the counter like that cute girl in the ZZ Top video ‘Legs’. Look, look…OOPS!”

  5. AB fan says:

    He’ll bet he ONLY reason we watch any of this show.

  6. Daria says:

    She couldn’t just walk a few feet around the table?
    Anyway I’ll be watching! I wonder who is going to get injured in some way this year…

  7. Annie says:

    I can’t wait for the recaps. They are always spot on and perfect

  8. Amanda says:

    Can’t wait to see who they “accidentally” leak out as the winner.

  9. J-Man says:

    Has anyone noticed that they’re not calling it “The NEXT Food Network Star” on the promos? They just call it “Food Network Star.” I wonder if this means anything … like maybe no more guarantee of a series?

    • Lana says:

      Maybe it’s because in half-a-dozen seasons the show hasn’t produced the “next” Food Network star. The show has only produced one Food Network “star”, as far as I can tell. All of the others can be called “Food Network Hosts” or “Food Network Personalities,” at best.

      • Plumpy says:

        So true. And some of the runners-up have been given consolation prize shows on FN or Cooking Channel.

      • reneedog says:

        You call McCargo or D’Arabian or Sequera PERSONALITIES????????

        I call them losers.

        The show has failed for several years now to come up with anything resembling a star.

        What they have come up with are nervous, figgity, gigglers who get their “shows” scheduled in network deadspots.

        • Mark H88 says:

          I was thinking the same thing… this next winner is going to join the prestigous ranks of ‘stardom’ as Aaron McCargo, Mellisa D’Arabian, and Aarti Sequera?????

          Really?? That’s about as exciting as winning a chance to be on a college radio station.

  10. Sue Z says:

    so far the commercials for it creep me out worse than any of the earlier seasons — those slow-mo heads turning with the vacant stars and empty grins. Reminds me of some sort of zombie show. Which actually might make the season more bearable if it were zombies.

  11. Old Unkajoe says:

    Me no understand title of this post.

  12. FuriousGeorge says:

    Thiis season looks awesome! I’m sorry but I happen to like drama and that’s what I love about this show.

    I hope Alton tears her a new one!

    LOVE LOVE LOVE AB!!

    Whip ‘em into shape, I just wish they would batttle Robert Irvine against Alton.

    Oh and I am worried about the no “NEXT” thing…DON’T CANCEL THIS IS MY FAVORITE SHOW IN THE WORLD

    Oh and BIG FANS are DREW BARRYMORE TINA FEY
    they know what’s good also love worst cooks in america

  13. Barb says:

    There are few things I love more on TV than this show. They’re bombarding the afternoons with last season’s episodes and I was lucky enough to catch the one yesterday when Dzintra “shushed” Aria when they were supposed to be presenting to the judges. Shushed her and nudged her. Priceless. Could not possibly have been scripted because no one would ever think that anyone could pull that off, if it had been scripted, as if it weren’t scripted. O god please let there be a Dzintra on this season….

    • Plumpy says:

      I trust there will be every hackneyed stereotype your heart desires.

    • Lunalovegood says:

      Lol, last season had its moments. I loved the one where Tom was in front of the judges and got flustered and said he liked to play with himself. That was classic.

  14. Plumpy says:

    I am eagerly awaiting the hilarious recaps for this trainwreck of a show.

  15. FuryOfFirestorm says:

    Alton flinched because he was shown a picture of Bobby Flay rubbing BBQ sauce on his moobs.

  16. Ray says:

    Almost worth watching, for Alton. However, it appears the show airs at the same time as Game of Thrones, so I’ll miss it. I’ll read the recap here, or maybe catch a rerun at some point.

  17. ABFan says:

    wonder if AB’s excuse of the cable being out at his hotel is just so he doesn’t have to watch (on twitter he said that the cable’s on the fritz in his hotel room and he won’t be able to see the show – and he’s live twittering)

  18. mfm says:

    I think that Penny chick needs to go right away – what a major PITA

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