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35

New Products From Food Network Chefs
Posted on July 28th 2011 by Jillian Madison

[Ed. note: these totally fake Food Network ads were created and submitted by FNH reader Yaer Quintero. Nicely done!]


Other posts on Food Network Humor:

---If The Food Network Chefs Had Food Trucks…
---South Park Versions Of Food Network Chefs
---If The Food Network Chefs Were On Facebook (Part 1)
---Halloween Costume Suggestions For The Food Network Chefs: Part 2
---Food Network Chefs Are Going To Kill Someone

    35 Responses

  1. Hitlerforce says:
    July 28, 2011 at 10:30 am

    Sandra Lee’s DUI is disturbing in that it could actually be a recipe of hers, for certain values of “recipe”.

    Reply
  2. THE Holly says:
    July 28, 2011 at 10:59 am

    Paula’s teeth really make the whole thing for me.

    Reply
    • pottymouth princess says:
      July 28, 2011 at 3:15 pm

      They remind me of that episode of Friends in which Ross’ teeth glowed in the dark.

      Great work!

      Reply
      • tahitigirl says:
        July 28, 2011 at 7:54 pm

        The first true laugh-out-loud moment was seeing the visual of Paula Deen’s teeth on the butter package. The second was reading The Holly’s comment. And the third was the Ross reference. Gut busting stuff!

        Reply
    • Plumpy says:
      July 29, 2011 at 5:53 pm

      The teeth were great. Outstanding work. Loved them all.

      Reply
  3. Jenn says:
    July 28, 2011 at 11:13 am

    Loved this until I read the description of the Paula’s Organic Butter. DO NOT READ if you are already feeling queasy! =S

    Man, you guys at FNH really know how to rock it!

    Reply
    • Yaer says:
      July 28, 2011 at 2:08 pm

      Statement from Paula Deen:

      “Having butter made of my own cholesterol is a logical line of food for me to have, I need MO’MONEY and got plenty of cholesterol.”

      Hmm part of that statement sounds oddly familiar.

      Reply
    • J-Man says:
      August 1, 2011 at 3:30 am

      I think Bobby uses the butter for other purposes than cooking …

      Reply
  4. YOUBUGME says:
    July 28, 2011 at 11:53 am

    OMG! Trying to hold in the laughter at my desk after reading Fieri’s salsa descriptions!

    Reply
  5. Tom says:
    July 28, 2011 at 11:57 am

    I would like to see a Bobby Flay grill. It could be a wildly over priced piece of shit. Worth it because it would come with a cookbook in case you don’t know any grilling recipes.

    Reply
  6. ChrisEW says:
    July 28, 2011 at 12:09 pm

    Before I scrolled down and read the text, I seriously thought the Fieri salsa was real. I could totally see him marketing crappy salsa for $10 a bottle.

    Reply
    • ED says:
      July 28, 2011 at 1:22 pm

      Oh, Guy Ferry salsa exists alright. I’ve seen it at the deli in our neighborhood. And it pains me to admit this, but the flavor descriptions look pretty good
      (/runs away in shame)

      Reply
      • Laura says:
        July 28, 2011 at 3:07 pm

        Our local supermarket mentioned the Guy Ferry salsa in their flyer recently. Just his face on a jar makes the entire thing unappetizing.

        Reply
        • SPA GIT TEEEEE says:
          July 28, 2011 at 4:04 pm

          I agree, Laura. Makes me want to rip those stupid sunglasses off his head, whether they are on the front or back at the time.

          Reply
      • Plumpy says:
        July 29, 2011 at 5:54 pm

        Shitty Shitty Bang Bang would be me if I even so much as glanced at his salsa.

        Reply
  7. Skats says:
    July 28, 2011 at 12:14 pm

    Her teeth! Hahahahaha!

    Reply
  8. Diane says:
    July 28, 2011 at 1:19 pm

    Bwahahahahaha!
    The ‘Shitty Shitty Bang Bang’ one has me rolling. Well done, Yaer!

    Reply
  9. Lauren says:
    July 28, 2011 at 1:56 pm

    OMG, the Giada one had me rolling!

    Reply
  10. Laura says:
    July 28, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    You’ll love my salsa or my name isn’t Guy Fier….Well, your name isn’t Guy Fieri…

    Reply
  11. pottymouth princess says:
    July 28, 2011 at 3:20 pm

    I couldn’t get past “smallpeenville” without tears rolling down my face.

    I am not surprised that Ferry has a line of overpriced salsa in the marketplace. Hopefully, after the failure of Retched Ray’s chicken stock and EVOO, the store will know better than to buy any more celebrity shit (although they’re selling Coppola and Batali pasta sauces for 7.99…guess someone is buying those).

    Reply
  12. So There says:
    July 28, 2011 at 10:44 pm

    Love, love the Giada one! It was perfect!

    Reply
  13. Cynic Onlooker says:
    July 28, 2011 at 10:55 pm

    It looks like Malificent posed for Guy’s salsa, lmao. Eat it and you’ll be poisoned!

    Reply
  14. Gorilla says:
    July 29, 2011 at 12:45 am

    Gawd…the same jokes warmed over again like yesterday’s meat.

    Please come up with something original…

    Reply
  15. Jackie says:
    July 29, 2011 at 9:55 am

    I sent one in of Ina and her “GOOD Olive Oil.” “Can’t find good olive oil? Buy it from me! Then you’ll know it’s GOOD!”

    Reply
  16. Little Miss Smartass says:
    July 29, 2011 at 12:34 pm

    This was MUCH too funny!!! Paula’s teeth kill! Well Done!

    Reply
  17. Kenny says:
    July 29, 2011 at 2:26 pm

    I laughed out loud so bad with shame here at work, I am gonna wait and look at it again so I can laugh some more OMG!

    Reply
  18. Amy says:
    July 30, 2011 at 5:03 am

    Holy shit, the Giada product is GENIUS.

    Reply
  19. reina says:
    July 31, 2011 at 10:14 pm

    u forgot ray ray’s Evoooooooo

    Reply
  20. J-Man says:
    August 1, 2011 at 3:32 am

    “DUI” is missing two key ingredients: at least one seasoning packet and some pumpkin pie spice.

    Reply
  21. krosstx says:
    August 2, 2011 at 3:31 pm

    What? No picture or description of RayRay’s $95 garbage bowls? These were awesome…LOVED the Guy salsa!

    Reply

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