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Alex Guarnaschelli’s Fish en Papillote en 8 MILES OF TIN FOIL
---Anne Burrell, Robert Irvine, and Alex Guarnaschelli Will Compete To Become The Next Iron Chef
---A Heartwarming Selection Of Alex Guaranschelli’s Most Fattening Tweets
---ADVICE FOGELSON Meme
---Ridiculous Alex Guarneschelli Quote Of The Week
Alex Guarnaschelli, General: Food Network »
Alex Guarnaschelli’s Fish en Papillote en 8 MILES OF TIN FOIL
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Alex Guarnaschelli made fish en papillote on this weekend’s episode of Alex’s Day Off, and I swear to God, the woman used enough aluminum foil to stretch from Earth to the moon 17 times:
Look at the size of that thing. That’s not a pouch, it’s an airline pillow!
When she cut it open, the thing was filled with more hot air than Susie Fogelson. Why did she use so much? She was cooking a 6-oz piece of fish, not the shark from JAWS.
Why, with all that extra aluminum foil, Alex could have…
Maybe next time, Alex. The chickens are waiting.
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---The Alex Guarnaschelli Zombie Photo---Anne Burrell, Robert Irvine, and Alex Guarnaschelli Will Compete To Become The Next Iron Chef
---A Heartwarming Selection Of Alex Guaranschelli’s Most Fattening Tweets
---ADVICE FOGELSON Meme
---Ridiculous Alex Guarneschelli Quote Of The Week
- Alex Guarnaschelli
- General: Food Network
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(c) 2012 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
We are not affiliated with the Food Network, or any of their hosts, in any way. This is a satire, humor, and parody website.
(c) 2012 Food Network Humor - All Rights Reserved
75 Responses
I was so distracted by ABBA wearing foil that I didn’t even notice their faces at first. I love Bobby Flay’s face with that body!!
*chuckling* me too!
Looks like Booby had a breast reduction.
That was funny, partly because I’m often guilty of doing the same thing. I’m an aluminum foil whore, and I mean the heavy duty extra strength shit.
WerD. My kitchen is the Republic of Foil. :P
You wouldn’t be Canadian, would you? Or have happened to have seen a show called “The Republic of Doyle”?
Oh Syd I’m with you! Gads and gads of the shiny stuff used regularly, especially at Thanksgiving. Our ‘bird’ is gonna get that bikini treatment. My family will explode with laughter. PS: I thought you cooked ‘on pappy-haute’ in parchment.
Count me in as another aluminum foil whore! Bobby’s face on abba is perfect
I noticed on the ABBA album cover that OUR Alton Brown (AB) has the “Good” body, good thinking there.
WOW, is that a hint of smile from Ms. Constipatedfaceelli?
Didn’t know she had it in her to turn that frown upside down.
Wait — where are Bobby’s moobs?
On the shirtless guy I saw jogging on Saturday, ewww! I could have gone a lifetime without seeing that.
Ms. Constipatedface is the queen of wastefulness…In an episode where she was making Indian-’inspired’ food, I counted how many huge glass bowls she used to make a simple naan-bread dough…FIVE!!! (other utensils like a cookie-sheet excluded)
I giggled at all of ‘em. I could see George Hamilton lovin’ that bed. Outside. By a pool. With a drink.
LOL! Great image, BOO! :)
This is Hall of Fame funny.
I couldn’t agree more! Alex is such a snot-face.
Definitely Hall of Fame funny!
I agree. This had me roaring with laughter. Love Guy’s ‘do and the tinfoil kiss hats, but the ABBA cover is perfection!
Loved the Abba cover, but the tin foil hats made me choke on my tea! Hall of Fame all the way.
“Really pissed off the Neelys” – Jillian, you are a GENIUS. So clever! You always surpass my level of disgust for those two and I love it!
is it me, or does Alex seem to be (trying to) impersonate Nigella Lawson?
by the way, “more hot air than Susie Folgelson”. LMAO. that had me spitting my tea out…
Didn’t see the show, but how do you mean? Alex would need a major fat transfer from her caboose to her engine to rival Nigella now.
not necessarily the way they look, but the mannerisms. Nigella tries (quite successfully I think) to make food “sexy”, she’s very alluring with the camera. Next time you watch Alex, watch for her own “alluring” wink. I swear, she’s trying to emulate Nigella….LOL.
Alex has about as much sex appeal as a placemat. I watched her cook duck once and I’m wiling to bet she chewed off HUGE caveman bites the minute the camera was off.
“HUGE caveman bites” had me rolling, oh! :)
Chef Boyarschelli couldn’t carry Nigella Lawson’s make-up bag.
LOL !
“Chef Boyarschelli”
OY MY GOD! That made my entire week! Thank you, Silvio!
Why does she always look so pissed? I’d hate to have to face her on Chopped. She’s a beeyotch.
what’s the big deal with Nigella? I mean, most of the time her food does not look all that appetizing. She’s cute, but she’s nothing to write home about.
Alex couldn’t carry Nigella’s spatula. Ever notice on
Alex’s show how she talks like she’s instructing
1st graders? Talks soooo slow so we can “get it”.
How annoying is she?
At least she isn’t wearing that horrible half heart/chain necklace thing that she wore on every tv show for the last year.
HAHAHA!! Great observation.
no, i noticed that too. But now she has a new favorite that she wears on every show it has little things hanging off it. It’s ok, but for the love of God, buy yourself 10 and alternate. We all know she has the money to do that and more.
I think we all know the Neely’s better than that! If they can do it on the cutting block during a commercial break I am sure they could break out the vegetable oil, give a few squirts on that foil and make a day of it. Throw a few stick of butter in after 15 minutes and I am sure Paula Deen would jump right in… OK now I am sick.
Ewww. So funny, but gross. :)
The FNH diet: read about the Neelys on the tinfoil bed at lunch time.
Working for me :)
Poking my eyes out to remove that vision.
I doubt they would use oil… the leftover bbq sauce from the restaurant is more likely. Throw in some ancho chilis and Bobby Flay would join in. Add some good vanilla and EVOO and it’s a party!
Those may be the most disturbing words I have ever written.
Why do so many of my FNH compatriots, especially on this post, seek to blind me? Have I been a bad girl lately?
you all crack me the heck up, i fell outta my chair and had to grab the dogs go get back up. vodka :)
OMG absolutely hilarious!
I also have to add – what was with her uber zen seductress voice for that entire episode? Is she trying to be Giada?
http://jennylearnstocook.com
BWAAAA! I think I just peed a little.
Alex with her foil hat looks like the most frightening Hershey’s kiss I’ve ever seen.
HAHAHA. WIN!
Too funny!
I’m waiting for Sandra Lee to make a tablescape out of aluminum foil.
That sounds about right. She could bake a cake from mix and decorate it with Hershey kisses still in the wrappers, pop some Jiffy Pop and just go nuts.
That ABBA cover is so funny, it’s Bjorn Flay, Agnetha Guarnaschelli, Frieda Ray and Benny Brown!! Made me wonder about their songs: Grilling Queen, SOS (Sandra on Sauce), Souper Grouper, Ham-a Mia, The Winner Eats it All, and Fernandough!
that’s hysterical PowefulNiolani. I thought of “al Dente Al dente”, “My Love My Knife”, “Chickentita”, and “I’ve Been Baking for You”.
I love both of you so much right now; you absolutely made my evening!
Ahem, it’s actually Agnetha Ray and Frieda Guarnaschelli.
LOL en papillote means “in parchment”, even I a non-chef knows this.
Actually, it means “in a pillow”; I guess Alex likes really BIG pillows. She probably sleeps with a body pillow.
No doubt about it….Alex has no where near the class that Nigella exudes. I caught Alex’s act during several episodes of ‘Chopped’ and wanted to scream. Even when it ‘seems’ as if she enjoys a particular chef, her delivery of emotion associated with her positive sentiment is abyssmal!
I think Jillian may have uncovered Alexs’ vice….Foil!
P.S. I LOVE FNH!
Jillian, when I first saw the title of the post I thought, tin foil? How is she going to make this funny? Then I scrolled and laughed and scrolled and laughed harder… I swear you could talk about coat hangers and be hilarious. This is totally Hall of Fame. The pointy hats, Guy Fieri’s turdball expression… it’s just awesome. ;-)
You know what? I don’t think that would piss off the Neely’s at all. And here’s why: They can get their brown sugar ALL OVER the place, and not have to change the sheets after.
You’re picturing it right now, aren’t you?
Trying not to, actually.
With Sara on the really trying not to picture that.
I didn’t want to either. But you mention the Neelys and put a picture of a bed with it and a person just assumes, you know.
*Brown Sugar* I shudder at the thought.
I was having a rough day, but I have a huge smile on my face. That was definitely one of the funniest posts yet. I don’t know how you come up with ‘em, Jillian!!!
Alex + Foil = Heavy Metal
Ohohoho you :P I chuckled.
Spot on, Kev! :^)
So that’s what Alton would look like with hair… meh. He looks better as is. I could totally see Bobby Flay sporting 70s hair though. Or maybe a mullet.
Retched Ray is looking more and more like Carol Channing these days…
It’s the JIFFY POP BALLOON BOY!!! Separated @ birth!
Totally just realized that the foil looks like a Pepperidgefarm Goldfish cracker.
LOVE THIS!! The Abba pic and the ‘Neely’s’ bed had me rolling. :)
Giggles GALORE! I have to say I especially like the picture of with the foil hat. Thanks for the laughs.
They should rename “Alex’s Day Off” to “Alex’s Day Off (from being a bitchh)”. I finally watched her cooking show and I’ve never seen so many fake smiles. What a phony! We know you’re evil, we’ve seen you as a power-abusing judge!
What are they doing to those chickens?!!?
“Pissed off the Neely’s”…LMFAO!!!