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FNH Goes To Kohl’s: The Most Ridiculous Food Network Products Ever
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Over the weekend, a few friends and I went to Kohl’s to pick up some new bath towels. While there, we decided to poke around in the housewares section to see if anything fun was on sale. While we didn’t find anything worth buying, we did see some of the ugliest, most overpriced Food Network/Bobby Flay related products we had seen in a long time. Here were the 5 most ridiculous things we encountered:
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It’s pretty hard to make a CUP ugly, but Bobby Flay succeeded because these are some of the ugliest glasses we have ever seen. They look like something my grandmother would have put out for company she hated. In 1973. And seriously, who thought the “smoker’s teeth yellow” hue would be a good idea? Truly hideous.
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Monogram coasters could have been a cute idea, if they didn’t make them look like BABY BLOCKS. And who in their right mind would pay TEN DOLLARS for 8 (eight) coasters? Total fail.
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Exactly who am I cooking a burger for? The world’s fattest man? I’m sorry, but there’s no reason for this thing to be so large – other than for Flay to justify charging almost 30 bucks for it. I cook huge pizzas on my grill, and have made out just fine with normal sized-spatulas, thank you very much. And for the record, if you need something the size of an AIRPLANE WING to help you maneuver your grilled food, seek help right away.
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Twenty five freakin’ dollars? FOR THAT? Have people lost their minds? Who on Earth would even consider paying $25 for a gaudy pitcher that was made in China, just because it has Flay’s name on it? Bitch, please. It looks like picnic-ware from the Dollar Store.
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I couldn’t get a good photo of this in the store, so I found this one on the Kohl’s website. It’s a napkin holder… make that THE WORLD’S TACKIEST NAPKIN HOLDER. It looks like something Guy Fieri would wear on his thumb. Thanks, but I’ll pass.
Other posts on Food Network Humor:
---Ridiculous Food Network Product Of The Week: Bobby Flay Acrylic Pitcher---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Bobby Flay’s TOASTED BURGER BUNS
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Ellie Krieger’s Dark Chocolate Dipped Pretzels
---Ridiculous Food Network Recipe Of The Week: Hungry Girl’s FROZEN WAFFLE FRIES
---Ridiculous Food Network Product Of The Week: Paula Deen Hey Y’All Brooch
- Bobby Flay
- General: Food Network
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94 Responses
holy shmokes!
no telling what kinda shit people will buy.
knock yerselves out.
Six words for you: Rachael. Ray. Four. Quart. Garbage. Bowl.
If you’ve got $20 to wipe your ass with, you can “minimize your trips to the garbage can by…putting all of your unwanted scraps in one place until you’re ready to dump it out.” Would you prefer green, blue, orange, red, or **eggplant**?
I don’t understand the necessity for napkin rings anyway. And that is a super-ugly ring!
I Gare-uhn-teee that you will see this napkin ring if Aarti gets a show.
LOL Some of those things look like 1980′s Pizza Hut.
LOL. I was thinking the same thing!
OMG that is *exactly* what they look like! I couldn’t quite place it in my mind, but you hit it perfectly. Yup, I’m pretty sure I used to drink coke poured for a almost identical pitcher into identical copies of those hideous brownish cups at the sit-in Pizza Hut.
Hahaha! That’s it, exactly!
Not to be redundant but the first thing I thought of was going to Pizza Hut in the 90s xD
Yep 1980s Pizza Hut. I was in high school and we went there ALL the time!
Weren’t the Pizza Hut glasses and pitchers red?
That apparently happened in the ’00′s. They were apparently brown before.
Apparently.
OK, I KNOW I’m weird, but I kinda like the yellow-brownish glassware. Call me crazy.
But that other crap is ridiculous. I’ve seen a plastic pitcher that looks almost exactly like that $25 one at the freakin’ Dollar Tree! And that napkin ring looks perfect for one of Aunt Sandy’s tablescapes.
I agree, I kinda like the glasses too. But yeah, I’m weird too.
The napkin ring looks like a prop from a Bollywood movie. Thi pitcher is a Dollar Tree special and as klutzy as I am in the kitchen, even I can get away with a spatula 1/4 the size.
The yellow glassware is just nauseating.
At first I thought you posted pictures from a garage sale you visited this weekend.
::::blink ::::blink
LOL I think you summed it up quite nicely.
Jillian, that’s not an over-sized spatula…that’s a Paula Deen Pooper Scooper, artisanally hand-crafted and able to pick up your biggest driveway messes….right, Paula??
All of the FN stuff at Kohls is a huge rip off and ugly to boot. If I’m going to spend that kind of dough, I’ll hit Macy’s or William & Sonoma.
There’s actually a colander made by FN at Kohl’s that I adore — I think it’s called a tulip-colander, but I’m not sure. But the damn thing is like, $50. For a colander. Somebody sure is proud of their Chinese-made crap!
There’s a new one on sale on ebay for $11.99 in case you’re interested.
I too, looked at this colander for almost 2 years and could not justify the price. I finally bought it at 50% off (it was on the clearance rack) and then I got an additional 10 or 15% off. I have to admit that I absolutely LOVE it. I use it everyday that I cook at home. I keep it on the counter and it is always in use. If you can get it for about $23 like I did it is worth it and it looks fabulous.
So Tyler, tell us again how long you have been sucking cock
Huh. I guess there’s no room here for individual tastes:
1 – I like the brown smoked glasses. Yeah, they’re a little retro and remind me of my parents’ glasses from the 70s. I wouldn’t want them as my only glasses but in a game/room or basement bar area I think they’d be kind of fun.
2 – I didn’t think the coasters were that hideous and $10 for 8 coasters is not an unreasonable price. I actually make my own coasters by going to the tile section of the hardware store and buying really cool decorative tiles for about $1 each. Then I add little felt “feet” to them and … voila … coasters. At a cost of … GASP … about $1.15 each or nearly $10 for 8 of them. I guess I’m a complete FAIL.
3 – I love the large spatula. I have a pizza peel that I’ve singed on the grill before and I love the idea of having a metal version for turning pizzas or large filets of fish or whatever. I guess that makes me another failure as a cook, since I’m not capable of using smaller spatulas.
4 – I agree that $25 for a plastic pitcher that you can get at Target for 1/3 of that price is pretty ridiculous.
5 – I use napkin rings because we use real cloth napkins in our house and it’s fun for each of us to have our own rings. It keeps us from having wadded up napkins left on the table as well.
So .. uh. I guess to each their own. Usually FNH is funny … but this is just snobby and pissy about items that you personally don’t use or have different taste in.
No accounting for taste? If you like these products, you must be blind. Run along and enjoy your time in 1970. And if you have that much money to burn and waste on overpriced shit, send me some.
The proucts are 100% FUG. Even if you liked them aesthetically, which is obviously your perogative, how can you justify those grossly high prices????? Ten dollars for 8 paper coasters is embarrassingly high. And that pitcher for $25? I’m with Dave and FNH on this one. You’d have to be certifiable to pay that much cash for that ugly, cheap looking thing.
I don’t think KARA realized they were PAPER coasters that cost as much per piece as a freakin’ floor tile! A steal I tell ya, a STEAL!
5. ‘…wadded up napkins left on the table.’
So you use the cloth napkins over and over, but since each of you has your ‘own’ napkin ring that keeps your kids’ saliva off your lips? All I can say is ewwwwww.
I use cloth napkins too, which are promptly washed and ironed before their next use.
Cara,
Have another doughnut.
Kara,
You are right about one thing. You are a complete FAIL!
WOW! One may disagree with Bobby Flay’s style, product prices, and even Kara’s detailed rebuttals/personal opinions, but why does she, over Flay, deserve such spite? Geesh, I get that if you say she can express her personal opinion, then you can too. At least she didn’t tear down a good, thoughtful post, she simply stated her opinions.
PS- I also don’t believe Kara realized the coasters were one use, disposable, making them yes, ridiculously priced.
PSS- I also like the brown smokeware and actually, if you find some of the “original”, it can go for a damm good price.
Some people really should be required to take a test before they are allowed to run around the internet unleashed. I didn’t realize that having your own opinion immediately subjected you to rude, nasty comments that don’t even relate to the original topic in the first place. Kara’s entitled to have her own opinion just like each of you are entitled to make fools out of yourselves by posting comments like, “have another doughnut”. I can’t imagine how you treat your friends when they voice their own opinions, Lord help them.
WTF? Why is she being attacked, again? Because she is herself? This is supposed to be snarky, not mean.
Good on you, Kara, for voicing your opinions in a polite, respectful way. The people who replied to your posts were anything but. I’m sure Jillian doesn’t want an army of mindless drones on this site who attack the first person who dares to differ. I get the sense sometimes that they’re all vying for Jill’s attention (i.e. who can agree with her the loudest). Still, that shouldn’t be a reflection on her wonderful site. And, for the record, I don’t particularly care for any of those FN products, but you know, to each his own. I just would never pay for any of that lol
While I do agree what you said about the people attacking Kara being over the top. I think you are giving her too much credit, she definitely wasn’t voicing her opinions politely or respectfully, it was definitely passive aggressive/sarcastic. I’m not sure if you didn’t see that or if you felt bad for her after the responses. A previous poster also disagreed about the yellow glasses and no one attached him for it because he wasn’t being condescending.
Sure theres something to say about having a different opinion, but when you do it scornfully you can’t be surprised by other people wanting to voice their opinions against yours.
Don’t show those napkin rings to Sandra Lee or else I think we may see them inspiring a tablescape sometime soon…
Are you sure that it’s not a cock-ring from the “Big Daddy” collection @ K-Mart?
If it was smaller, it would be Guy Fieri’s cock ring.
funny, because when I saw the picture of the coasters, all I saw was ‘BBC’. after I finished giggling like a little girl I realized that it might be an ‘O’ and not a ‘C’ but the damage was done!
Next covert mission: Big Lots and Pawler Deen’s crapware. I wonder how cheap (both in price and quality) it is.
I bought an enamel coated cast iron skillet from her collection at Big Lots because my wife is a sucker for the color turquoise. I paid $35 and this was from a closeout store so you can imagine what the original price must have been. Quality wise, it’s not bad. It’s quite heavy, heats evenly and the enamel hasn’t chipped yet. Then again, I suppose it’s kind of hard to screw up a cast iron skillet.
Interesting. That’s better than the reviews that Retched Ray’s enameled cast iron pots are getting. Apparently, the paint on those flakes almost immediately.
I need a good soup pot, but I’ll save up and buy Le Cruset; that way I know I’ll have it for life.
Potty Mouth, I bought a Le Creuset soup stock pot for $24 yesterday at TJ Maxx, if you’re so inclined… :)
I wouldn’t buy ANYTHING to cook in that comes from China. Who knows WHAT that stuff is made of, or has on it. Anyone who would put poison into toothpaste, kid’s toys and jewelry sure isn’t gonna hesitate with cookware!
My boyfriend bought me a Paula Deen batter bowl for Christmas this past year, and surprisingly, it’s actually a pretty good piece of stoneware. It’s durable, it holds up well, and I’ve used it a lot more than I thought I would. Who’d've thunk it?
Jillian, great Kohl’s scouting trip! Just goes to show that people’ll buy anything, regardless of its appearance, just to say they own ‘a Bobby Flay product.’ No way he’s using that crap in his restaurants.
On principle, I absolutely refuse to buy any product with a Food Network host’s name on it. I never will.
From the looks of things, I’m not missing out on anything.
But I lust after Alton’s Angle’s knives.
Shun knives ftw.
Thanks for the price heads up, Jillian. I won’t feel so bad when that $25.00 pitcher ends up at Good Will for $1.99.
And for the record, I think that large spatula is specifically for larger fish and such. I have no problem if Kara likes some of these items — our rancor should be directed at the FN, and not the residents of FN Humor.
I really like the ginormous spatula, but I must admit that I have a spatula fetish. It would be good for the grill, for frying emu eggs (LOL), and to turn whole fish, for sure. ;)
I bake a lot of homemade pies, and I use an oversized spatula to help separate my pie crust dough from the counter space after I’ve rolled it out and to help me get it into the pie tin. So I actually would use that spatula…although I would cringe at paying $30 for it. I’d probably look for it in the clearance bin instead.
As for the other stuff? No. Hell no.
Havent you watched shows where they roll up the dough on the rolling pin to transport to pie plate. I think that is an over used tip. It is as common as saying “it is just as important to add salt to a sweet recipe”.
It would be cool to post common phrases or tips like these. I am sure we can think of hundreds.
The rolling pin trick works as long as the dough isn’t sticking to the surface…and of course I’m never that lucky and part of the damn dough manages to find that ONE SPOT that didn’t have enough flour on it and sticks to it like glue. Until I reach Betty Crocker or Julia Child status and can do it with my eyes closed, I gotta stick to using my big honkin’ spatula. :)
I won’t buy stuff with a chef’s name on it because it is generally cheap quality, and I don’t believe that a TV chef has my best interests in mind. Plus these people have enough money as it is.
And if that is a drinking cup in the top right hand picture, Jesus is that thing big enough?
That’s the glass that Sandra Lee drinks her sangria and blue vodka fizzies out of.
I’m guessing Bobby Flay’s many wives don’t let him do the decorating.
I know Mario is pretty much exiled from FN, but how has there not been a post on this yet?
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/mario_waiters_cork_crewed_r1aicZc7ih57rt5aLhSkWI
You can’t take prices at Kohl’s seriously. There’s always some gimmick going, so you can get probably 20-40% off the ticketed price if you’re willing to stalk the ads. That being said, this stuff is still UGLY. I have done better in the houseware clearance aisle at TJ Maxx.
I was going to post in a similar vein, Sandy.
Has anyone ever paid full price for anything at Kohl’s?
And it will end up on the clearance rack at some point, anyway.
You are both so right! I hate when you get stuff at Kohl’s and the receipt says at the bottom “you saved $1,000″ !!! What a rip. My son gets stuff there, but I refuse to since I was in desperate need of a job at Xmas 1 year ago, and they dn hire me…I have a great record, but my credit was slipping…in the pre-employment training, the HR rep flat out told us that the main thing we would be doing is hawking their credit cards, since they make a LOT of revenue off that. Not surprised in the least. I HATE Kohls.
I do have a spatula that big, but it’s used to move cakes off of a springform pan bottom.
Jillian where’d you get a photo of my cock ring?
I was looking for a plain old plastic pitcher and saw that one at Kohl’s and was actually infuriated by how much it cost. $25! Seriously!!? So then I went on etsy and found a beautiful vintage depression glass one for the same price (including shipping). So in the Pitcher Throwdown, looks like Bobby Flay comes out the loser.
Those ridged glasses remind me of the cheap brown glasses you find in lots of dark college town pizza places.
No doubt. I had this kind of stuff in college when I had to shop at The Goodwill and All-a-Dollar (and it’s all long gone now, I donated it so that the next round of poor college students could buy it.)
No frickin’ way is that stuff going to make it’s way back into my house at radically inflated prices. This is the kind of stuff I see at Shakey’s Pizza on the edge of town that was last renovated in 1976.
Not gunna lie…the giant “spatchie spatchie” could probably provide me with hours of fun. But other than that, I don’t think I would buy any of the other products :blech:
“hides stains well” is not a selling points for glasses and pitchers, which is the only selling point those hideous things have.
And there’s one other use, too. When you serve your friends beer, they’ll think it’s a darker microbrew instead of the piss-yellow Keystone Light that it really is. Of course, they’ll know as soon as they take the first sip. Let them think they’re getting something good and then jerk the rug right out from under them! Your friends will love you like Guy Fieri for that little stunt.
A couple of months ago when I needed to fumigate my house, I bought a Ina Garten Shent at Kohls for the job. Yes, it was a bit pricey, but I knew it was worth it to get “the good kind”.
WTF? Passive-aggressive much?
Actually, I do like those big glasses. Iced Tea drinkers are always on the hunt for nice big glasses.
I actually have one of those big spatulas, I use it to separate cake layers so I can fill and frost cakes easily without dropping/damaging each layer. But mine is from Williams Sonoma and cost WAY less than this one!
The giant spatula just reminds me of the movie “Uncle Buck” when John Candy is using a snow shovel to flip giant pancakes….
You should see the toast, I couldn’t even get it through the door!
LOL LOL LOL UNCLE BUCK! JOHN CANDY! Great visual Patty! gotta love that snow shovel spatula!
How much does the giant spatula weigh?
I think it’s really from the Wilma Flintstone collection, she uses it to turn over Fred’s brontosaurus ribs.
This junk just goes to prove that some people’s taste is all in their mouth.
So wait…if she doesn’t email you, does that make her a PRETEND woman?
When I first saw the giant spatula, I thought for a second that Fred Flintstone had gotten into the celebrity kitchen gadget game, with an implement for flipping Brontosaurus burgers!!
Dammit…I didn’t notice that Ina Garten Da Vida (great name by the way) had beaten me to the Flintstone reference!So forget that i wrote that.
When I first saw the giant spatula, I thought for a second that Jeffrey Garten had gotten into the sex toy game, with the paddle he uses to spank his wife’s (errr) lil tush!
That spatula was used by Eva Longoria to apply her makeup for the latest Next Food Network Star episode.
It’s the same thing with FN talent cast iron. It’s over priced, made from inferior material and produced overseas.
I can get the same thing, of higher quality, for the same price and made in Tennessee.
As for that giant spatula… WTF? It’s too big to be a spatula and too small to be a pizza peel.
obviously that spatula is for giant oven-sized pancakes, a la Uncle Buck
~r.i.p john candy~
Ha!
Regarding the giant spatula, It’s bigger than my head, I thought you weren’t supposed to eat anything bigger than your head!!!!
May be he needs that giant spatula so he can spank the next food network star contestants. I don’t know just a thought but hey I live in Texas lol.
I think those were the same cups my grandma used to give us from the 1980′s.
As long as we’re on the subject of lousy Food Network products at Kohls, can we talk about Rachael Ray’s bake ware? She also hocks it on QVC, and it is the most awkward bake ware I’ve ever seen in my life. The high straight sides for handles don’t really seem easy to manage.They also create a lot of useless depth. I can only imagine trying to grab it out of a hot oven never mind trying to get something out of it with a spatula like cake or a lasagna. It seems like it was designed purely for looks by someone who doesn’t cook.
Don’t even get me started on Rachael Ray products. I was stupid enough to buy her stuff a couple years ago. Her whisk broke 2 weeks after I got it, the lid for the pasta pot warped after a few months, her self sharpening knife is dull, steak knife snapped and the coating for her stock pot starting wearing off. When I contacted her company I was told that since I didn’t buy it from the Rachael Ray store their lifetime warranty wasn’t in effect. Will never buy anything from them again.
Good tip, sorry you took the hit for the rest of us.
this FOOD NETWORK PRODUCT LINE FOR Kohl’s is OVER PRICED CHINA CRAP!!! NOT ONE ITEM IS AMERICAN MADE! FUCK YOU FOOD NETWORK AND YOU OVER PRICED PRODUCTS AT KOHL’S…lol….
Looks like props from the Mary Tyler Moore show that were put in a time capsule. I thought I remember Mike Stivic drinking out of that glass….