When it comes to Twitter, Alex Guarnaschelli is all about indulgence. When she’s not sending out self-indulgent messages about herself (“Saw a banner with my photo on it! Freaked me out!”), she’s sending over-indulgent messages about the taste and texture of food. Usually I just roll my eyes and scroll down the page, but this Guarnaschelli Tweet stopped me dead in my tracks:
Honestly, I don’t even think Paula Deen would have the balls to touch this one with a ten foot pole. If you’d like to try it, however, here are the steps:
Step 1: Go to store and purchase bread, cheese, mayonnaise, and butter. Get dirty looks from nutritionist standing behind you in line.
Step 2: Go home. Assemble it all into one fat, greasy mess. Consume with reckless abandon.
Step 3: Before going to doctor to pick up your cholesterol-lowering pills, swing by store to pick up larger pants.
Step 4: Twitter about it to gross everyone out.
Here’s further proof that when it comes to television, positioning and body angles are everything:
(The sign really says “The Next Great Chef”, a competition in which Alex was a judge. Thanks for sending in the pic, Butch!)
By popular request: here’s the “ridiculous” shot of Alex Zombieschelli overreacting about the taste of her dessert on last night’s episode of The Best Thing I Ever Ate. I should add that this has not been Photoshopped at all, so be very afraid.
You’re at a 9, Alex. We need you at about a 5. If I can’t see your eyeballs, that’s not telling me you’re enjoying your pudding. It’s telling me I should be worried my brains will be the final course.
On today’s premiere of Alex’s Day Off, her new series which is executive produced by Bobby Flay, Alex made a breakfast fit for a king (in all fairness, a king with a weight problem and a total disregard for his overall health… but I digress.) She cut her bacon so thick, the slices looked more like St. Louis ribs. She slathered her homemade doughnuts in enough cinnamon and sugar to choke a horse. She basted her eggs with leftover bacon grease. And she topped her butter-saturated potatoes with an *entire wheel* of Camembert.
And did you notice that everything was “RIDICULOUS?” She used that adjective so much, it was RIDICU… well, you know.
