As some of you already know, Jillian and I will be bringing you Food Network Humor’s very own audio podcast this Summer! Since we are excited, and hope you are too, we wanted to take the time and open up suggestions as to what sort of stuff you guys would want to hear. Food Network news? Listener mail, call-ins, and Twitter questions? Recipe disasters, or FN’s worst moment of the week? Now is the time to let those awesome ideas be heard!

Hey everybody!

As you may know, I’m currently in the middle of moving and completing massive repair work on my new home. I’m doing all of the labor myself, so it’s been a slow-going process. My closing date is this Friday and I still have an obscene amount of work to get done, so it’s crunch time!

I won’t have time to update FNH until Sunday or Monday. Until then, feel free to use this as an open thread to talk about Food Network stuff, or head to the forums to talk about whatever you’d like.

Sit tight – more news, photos, show recaps, and FNH voicemails are on the way!

Help! My boyfriend likes Guy Fieri, but I think he’s the douche of the year!

You see, every Sunday, we go through our DVR and watch the various Food Network shows he recorded throughout the week. Unfortunately, that means enough episodes of Diners Drive-ins and Dives and Guy’s Big Bite to make me sick with virtual amoebic dysentery.  I guess I should have known I was in trouble when my boyfriend asked me if he could sign our new refrigerator with a giant Sharpie, but like all women who date Guy Fieri fans, I was living in denial.

Do any of you have significant others who force you to watch Food Network programming you hate? Or perhaps they love one of the Food Network personalities that you just can’t stand?

You’re looking at a Christmas tree, with RED FUZZY BRANCHES that have been embellished with red silk flowers and glittery gold music notes. This clearly begs the question: IS THIS SANDRA LEE’S UGLIEST TREE EVER? Discuss amongst yourselves.

(from Saturday’s episode of Sandra Lee Celebrates on HGTV)

Last month, we gave away a Food Network prize package over at our pop culture satire site, Pophangover. The prizes included a large canvas Food Network tote bag, a copy of Bobby Flay’s latest overpriced cookbook, some kitchen towels, and this truly hideous, almost life-size promotional poster of Bobby Flay and the rest of the Next Food Network Stars:

Hilariously enough, a Bobby Flay-hating FNH reader named Judith ended up being one of the 3 random winners of the prize package. And guys, according to the email she fired off to me this morning, she needs our help:

Dear Jill,
Thank you so much. I received my prize package on Friday July 10. The bag is really nice, the kitchen towels are also nice as is the star-shaped fridge magnet. I’ve decided to give the Blobby Fay (no mistake!) hamburger cookbook to my 8-yr.-old granddaughter (I realize it’s a bit simple-but I’m sure she’ll get some ideas out of it-it’s way too simple for my son!) As for the poster- at first I thought to use it as a liner for my grandpuppy’s kennel (The thought of Bobby Flays face covered by a pile of puppy poo was priceless!) Then I realized that the feces and urine would just roll off–so anyone have any ideas on how to properly use this poster? Thanks again…Judith

So let’s have it, FNH: what the hell would YOU do with this poster?!

Did you catch the premiere of 5 Ingredient Fix with Claire Robinson this morning? We did! Here’s a quick rundown of our thoughts, and don’t forget to leave your opinions in the comments.

THE GOOD: The roast beef and gravy with Yorkshire pudding looked delicious, and Claire came across as a somewhat knowledgeable, engaging personality (even though we wanted to comb back those whispy hair tendrils on each side of her face).

THE BAD: The set design was awful. Everything was way too white. White cabinets. White knick-knacks. White dishes. White walls. White appliances. It looked like she was cooking in the back room of an Ikea warehouse. Even worse, the set  just felt way too big for her. You could fit a bowling alley in all the space between her and that back wall!

Also, her long, drawn out story about falling in love with Millionaire’s Shortbread on a trip to Scotland was just silly. She said, “I left a lot of my sweaters in the hotel so I could bring home 40 boxes of the shortbread!” Yeah. I’m so sure you did. Why not just bring your sweaters home, and make your own shortbread? Hmm?

THE UGLY: Get rid of that distracting pink colander on the back wall! It stands out like a sore thumb, and not in a good way. Also, we weren’t feeling Claire’s whole “pearls with flannel” look, or her silver and black studded belt. Did she pick up her wardrobe from Avril Lavigne’s Abbey Dawn line at Kohls?

THE VERDICT: Not half bad, with extra points being earned because it doesn’t star Guy Fieri. We think with a few minor tweaks, the Food Network could have a (gasp) hit.

Can you believe it – Food Network Humor is already two months old! Time sure flies when you’re making fun of Rachael Ray.

Thanks to everyone who has helped spread the word about the site. It’s been a great ride thus far. Now, we want to expand and improve. We ultimately want to become the premiere internet source for Food Network Satire and Food Humor, and to develop a thriving community for you guys. But to do that, we need to hear from YOU.

So let’s hear it. What do you want to see more of? Less of? What’s working? What’s not? Do you want more photos? Or more original humor? More text articles? Or more videos? What do you like? Or hate? Would you like the articles to be more personal? Less personal? Be as brutal as you like. We’re eager to hear your thoughts and are open to suggestions.

Thanks for reading!
-Jillian Madison, FNH Editor